The 'Promises' Saga: Hunters & Collectors
by f1manoz
Summary: The Saviour of the Citadel. The man behind the title is dead. His ship, the Normandy, blown apart. His allies are now spread across the galaxy, moving on with their own lives. And a new enemy now threatens humanity and the galaxy. Who will take up the mantle and face this latest foe? (Sequel to 'Search for Saren'.)
1. Connecting the Dots 1 - Shattered

_A/N – I'm back! Bit later than what I said. But a little thing called 'Dragon Age: Inquisition' has taken up pretty much all my time outside of work and holidays._

_So… er… Hello, dear readers! If you've already read 'Search for Saren', then this is the sequel to that. If you haven't read it, I guess you don't really need to read it as you'll figure out what happened in that story just from reading onwards. (Or you could, you know, go and read it. The choice is yours!)_

_Anyway, first thing is that I've been doing some thinking since I finished up the last story and I've come to a decision. 'Search for Saren', this and the next story (whatever it will be called) are no longer prequels to 'Promises Made, Promises Kept' as I'm going to make enough changes that these three stories simply won't fit what happened in the first story I wrote. To those who read 'PM, PK', all I can say is not to worry. There will be differences and I will be changing some events significantly enough that they just won't mesh with that story any longer._

_What that also means it that I'll be writing this, plus the story covering ME3 and also, perhaps, a new post-ME3 story. The reason I'll be doing that is because of the number of changes I will be making. 'Promises' was an incredibly fluffy, sentimental piece of writing based on a perfectly Paragon Shepard and with a set of rose-tinted glasses – the post-Reaper world I created was almost too perfect. Now while I will continue to write fluff etc., the post ME3 story I have planned for this trilogy won't be all sunshine and happiness. Grittier and darker, as there is no doubt a post-Reaper galaxy won't be a nice place to be, for a while at least._

_Rated M, as Shepard swears (he is a soldier, after all) and Jack also appears later in the story. It'll be a swear-a-thon! (Not really) Oh, and there'll be sex too. Dirty, dirty, naughty, sweaty sex. Bow-chicka-wow-wow._

_Just as a final note, the name of this story is named after an Australian band – it seemed apt as Collectors is part of the name. _

_Anyway, a few prologues to start off with, to cover events between the end of ME1 and the start of ME2. (So far I've written 9, may add more.) I know there are comics and all sorts of other non-game content that provide plenty of back-story, but I've done my own thing by linking the two, though haven't strayed from lore._

* * *

><p>Orbit around the planet of Alchera appeared clear of danger as the <em>SSV Perugia<em> disengaged its FTL drives and slowed to what could be considered crawling speed. They had received orders from Alliance HQ to proceed directly to the Amada System as the Alliance had received an SOS from, of all ships, the _SSV Normandy._ The _Perugia_ was sent to investigate at once.

"I have the beacon on scanners, sir. But no sign of any signal from the Normandy itself. Though I do have at least six faint signatures," stated Ensign Ramirez, "I believe they could be life-pods."

"Life-pods? But the Normandy was a stealth craft. It's… simply impossible," replied Captain Kowalski, "Scan for radio signals. Anything, Ramirez. There must be survivors in those life-pods."

Kowalski turned to where his pilot sat, his eyes on both the consoles in front of him but also glancing out the window out front. Generally front windows were only there for aesthetic purposes but you could still get a decent view when the ship was travelling slow or stopped. "Anything you can see out the front, Flash?"

Flight Lieutenant Gordon shook his head. "I've got nothing either, sir. Nothing on any scanners. I can't even see any wreckage out the front. If something did get the Normandy, it sure did a number on it."

Kowalski turned with his hands behind his back, head down slightly, as he paced back and forth along the gangway. He couldn't believe that, of all ships, the _Normandy_ had been lost.

_Damn._

"Sir, I've got something!" shouted Ramirez, "Someone's on the radio."

"… name is Liara T'Soni… I repeat, the Normandy has been destroyed… forces unknown… six life-pods… Shepard lost… require immediate assistance…"

You could have heard a pin-drop in the _Perugia_. Regular crew-men to officers all shared glances as news filtered through. They couldn't quite believe what they had heard. Every serviceman and woman at least knew the name of Commander Shepard. Since events on the Citadel, there was no greater hero in the Alliance.

"Ramirez, see if you can clear that up and respond. Ask them to clarify."

Ramirez keyed his console to clear up the reception. "Liara T'Soni. This is Ensign Ramirez of the SSV Perugia, Alliance Navy. Please repeat your previous statement regarding the Commander. I say again, please repeat your previous statement regarding the Commander."

There was a moment of silence before a voice replied. "Thank the Goddess. I repeat, the Normandy has been destroyed. We know of six life-pods which escaped. And Commander Shepard is missing. He was what you would call 'spaced' during evacuation."

"Miss T'Soni, this is Captain Kowalski, Commanding Officer of the Perugia. Hold tight. We'll get all survivors on board as soon as possible."

"Yes, Captain. We'll wait until further instructions."

Over the next two hours, the six life-pods were located and brought on board the _Perugia_. The crew were surprised to see one contain a turian and a krogan, everyone taking a step back as the krogan bent down and exited the life-pod, clear fury in his movements. The turian didn't look any happier, both moving away to stand alone though appearing to be on edge. The last life-pod was eventually brought aboard, with two navy crewmen stepping forward to open the door. First to step out was an asari, to the slight amusement of the navy personnel. She was followed by a female human doctor. To the amazement of nearly everyone, the third and last person to step out was a female quarian, who nearly collapsed as she stepped out of the life-pod, the doctor bending down slightly to hold her up, clearly providing some sort of comfort, with the asari helping steady the quarian on her other side.

One of the personnel stepped forward. "I'm Corporal Cole. I'm here to assess survivors." The Corporal glanced across the three females in front of him. "What's with the suit rat?" he asked, gesturing towards the quarian dressed in the dark suit.

The asari looked at the Corporal with pure venom in her eyes. "What did you just say, Corporal?" she hissed.

"I asked what was with the suit rat? What, is she upset or something? The hell is a quarian doing on one of these life pods anyway?"

The turian and krogan both stepped forward, placing themselves in front of the quarian. "I think you'd best apologise right now, before I lose my temper. You ever seen an angry krogan?" clear menace in the question stated, "My little friend here has just lost her Captain. Her friend. And she at the very least deserves your respect. Particularly from the likes of you."

The Corporal looked from the krogan to the turian, and then behind to the asari, who was now starting to shimmer in blue. "What do I have to apologise for? It's a simple question. I mean, what the hell was a quarian doing on board the Normandy anyway? It's a surprise we found you and the turian on one of these life-pods."

It all happened in an instant. The krogan pulled his shotgun from the small of his back, aiming at the chest of the corporal. The turian followed suit, an assault rifle in his hands in a second, aimed at the forehead of the Corporal. The sounds of rifles and pistols being un-holstered and cocked echoed throughout the hangar. At least half a dozen Alliance personnel had weapons trained towards them. The asari shimmered in a glorious blue, lifting a hand as the Corporal found himself trapped in a stasis field. The asari then stepped forward between the turian and krogan, ignoring the weapons now trained on her.

"I think someone needs to learn some manners," she stated, a tone of menace in her own voice, "How dare you show such disrespect! We are all crew of the SSV Normandy, under the leadership of Commander Shepard. First Human Spectre. Saviour of the Citadel. We've just survived one of the greatest battles in galactic history. And we've just witnessed the loss of a man we had chosen to follow until the very end. And you ask what is wrong?" She shook her head. "I know our Captain was proud of his service, but he would be ashamed right now. Probably of all of us."

A human male, clearly devastated himself, stepped forward, raising a hand as he remained unarmed, trying to defuse the situation. "Guys, this really isn't the way…"

The asari turned her head slightly. "I know it isn't, Kaidan. But we've just been rescued, and this is how we are treated… How she is treated," gesturing towards the quarian, "It's not right. Not after everything we've just been through. What would he have had said? I know what he would have done." She turned back towards the Corporal. "He'd have knocked some sense into him."

The quarian hadn't moved since this debacle had erupted, but finally she appeared to straighten as she stepped forward, placing a hand on the asari's shoulder. "Stop it," she said quietly, "He wouldn't want this. He wouldn't want any of this. Please… Liara, just stop it."

"I'm sorry, Tali," stated Liara, her eyes now starting to moisten as she turned to look at the quarian, hearing the heart-broken tone of her voice, before looking back at the Corporal, "But he should learn some manners. He had no idea what we've just been through. What you've just been through."

"I know, Liara. But none of this helps. And it doesn't bring him back. And he," gesturing towards the Corporal, "Means nothing by it, I'm sure. I've been asked a lot worse. And not many people would have expected someone like me to be rescued." She sighed. "Just let him go."

Liara nodded, and released the Corporal from the stasis field in which he'd found himself. The Corporal then took a few steps back, still looking at Liara with fear in his eyes. Tali turned around. "Garrus, Wrex, put your weapons away. We don't need any more deaths. Not today. We've been rescued. They are clearly here to help us. It's just… a misunderstanding. Please… just put them away."

The pair stared at Tali for a moment, before they both nodded and slowly lowered their weapons before stowing them on their backs. Tali turned to notice the Alliance personnel look at each other before slowly lowering their weapons, the tension in the room immediately disappearing as weapons were holstered. She looked up to see another human walking towards them. Tali backed up slightly and felt the rest of the _Normandy_ team close ranks around each other. He took off his hat and appeared solemn, or so Tali thought.

"Crew of the Normandy, my name is Captain Kowalski," the human male introduced himself, his voice softer than anyone expected. He turned towards Tali. "I take it you are Tali'Zorah?"

Tali nodded her head. "You know my name?" she asked in surprise.

Kowalski nodded in return. "I know all your names. I was briefed on the crew when we were ordered to this area." The Captain turned towards the Corporal. "Cole, come here. I think you need to learn about something. Let me introduce you to the crew of the Normandy."

The Corporal, rather sheepishly, walked towards his Captain with eyes firmly on the ground. "Cole, this is Tali'Zorah. She was an engineer on the Normandy."

"Pleasure to meet you, ma'am," the Corporal stated, "And I apologise for what just happened." The Corporal held out a hand, Tali hesitating for a moment before grabbing it as they shook hands, while shaking her head at the same time.

"No apology is necessary, Corporal, though I appreciate your words. I can understand your surprise. I take no offence. Trust me, I've had far worse introductions. Just… drop the suit rat thing. We're not all bad."

The Corporal looked sheepish again, before he grinned slightly and appeared relatively relieved. "Will do, ma'am."

"Garrus Vakarian," Kowalski stated, stopping in front of the turian, "C-Sec detective. Ex-turian military. I've heard good things about you." The turian simply gave a short bow.

"I hope they were all good," the turian replied, Kowalski just grinning and nodding.

The Captain then moved on, the Corporal still following him. "Urdnot Wrex. I've heard some stories about you. Don't suppose you could share some with the crew later?"

The krogan bellowed a short laugh. "Sure thing, Captain. I've got plenty. Quite a few would involve my friends here."

"Doctor T'Soni," the Captain announced, stopping in front of a now blushing asari, "I've actually read a couple of your dissertations. I don't know about the rest of the Alliance, but I believe what Shepard has stated is true."

Liara was clearly surprised. "You have?" Kowalski nodded. "It's good to know there is someone else out there who believes at least."

Kowalski stopped in front of Kaidan and the Doctor. "Who is now the acting Commanding Officer? I haven't seen Navigator Pressly retrieved from any of the life-pods."

The group in front of him all looked at each other before Kaidan stepped forward and saluted. "I believe that would be me, sir," he said sadly, "Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko. Commanding Officer Shepard and Executive Officer Pressly were both lost with the ship, sir." He gestured towards the rest of his crew. "Commander Shepard's team and crew have been through… something we never thought we would have to experience. And, as you would understand, we are very… protective of each other."

Kowalski shook his head sadly. "No need to explain anything, Lieutenant. I can understand emotions would be running high at the moment. But may I ask something, though?"

"Yes, Captain?"

"May I ask if the crew can relinquish their weapons please? I can assure that you are all safe here. Once we arrive back on the Citadel, they will be returned at once."

Alenko nodded and turned to the crew. "Hand over your weapons. As the Captain said, we're safe here. We don't need them any longer." He heard Garrus and Wrex mutter under their breaths but they took their weapons out again, and holding them barrel first, handed them to the Alliance personnel, who gave a brief nod as they took them. Tali hadn't moved a muscle. Alenko took a step towards her.

"Tali?" he asked softly.

"It's the only thing I have left… He gave it to me…," she whispered.

"The Captain has asked politely, Tali. We're safe here."

Tali looked up at Alenko. He couldn't see her face but he knew she was upset from the tone in her voice, almost breaking as she continued. "I can't… If they take this, I have nothing left that is real. Nothing that I can hold onto."

Alenko looked back at the Captain, eyes verging on pleading. "Can she keep it, Captain? Please?"

The Captain appeared to think for a moment. He could hear the pleading voice of the Lieutenant. But there was also no doubting the heart-broken tone of the quarian. He nodded his head. "Okay. Just make sure it's kept safe and it should be fine."

Tali looked down at the shotgun in her hands. The inscription he had written on the stock. The only gift he had given her that she had managed to save. Apart from the medal she always kept in her suit, close to her heart. Tali stood surrounded by the rest of the crew, but had never felt more alone.

Slowly she started to tremble as the tears started to flow again.

She felt the arms of Liara and Chakwas wrap around her again. Trying to bring comfort. They had been doing that ever since they had escaped the _Normandy_. Ever since they had heard him die over the radio. Deep in her mind, she appreciated what they were trying to do. But it was pointless.

She was empty.

And he was gone.


	2. Connecting the Dots 2 - Say Goodbye

The auditorium was near silent as hundreds of men and women, of numerous races, whether human, asari, turian or quarian, filtered in and took their assigned seats. There were whispers and murmurs as old friends greeted each other but there was no happiness on this occasion. Most people were silent and alone with their thoughts. Although taking place on the Citadel, this was very much an Alliance, and human, affair. An Alliance flag, plus the flag of the Commander's nation of birth, hung at half-mast on the stage. To the left and right of the stage were more Alliance colours and symbols. Despite his status as a Spectre, and his role in the defeat of both Sovereign and Saren, it appeared to most that the Council itself did not commemorate the loss of one of their agents.

David Anderson entered the auditorium alone. He was dressed in his Alliance uniform, despite his recent change in status. He still wore the Captain's bands on his shoulders. He was doing his best to keep his face blank. Devoid of emotion. Inside, though, was different. If he believed a heart could be physically broken, then he figured a doctor could open him up and find his heart in two.

News had filtered quickly through the Alliance News Network once the _SSV Normandy_ had been destroyed. Survivors had been located, including most of Shepard's assembled crew. Anderson knew them all. Knew they were all his friends as well as colleagues. Knew they would be hurting as much as him.

They had been rescued by the _SSV Perugia_, and although there was a minor incident during their rescue, the _Perugia_ was otherwise instructed to return to the Citadel at once. It had only taken two days for the survivors to arrive on the Citadel, Anderson ensuring he was there to meet them. He looked them over as they disembarked. He didn't think he'd seen a more distraught group of people in his life.

The survivors were put up in a hotel, where Anderson made sure to keep in constant contact with them, while an immediate search of Alchera was started by the Alliance. He wanted it to continue until his body was found. But he was over-ruled by both his fellow Councillors and eventually the Alliance Parliament. They believed it was impossible Shepard survived, with which he agreed, but they also believed it more than likely impossible to find his body. He protested until he was blue in the face but it fell on deaf ears. After only two weeks, the search was called off.

In the Alliance records, a status was changed:

Cmdr. Shepard, John W.: Killed in Action

Anderson took his seat at the front of the auditorium, the large mahogany coffin laying in front of him. He knew it was empty. He hated the thought. Next to the coffin was a picture of the Commander, his official picture taken when he became an Officer of the Alliance Navy. He grimaced slightly, knowing that the coffin was empty, always believing that Shepard's body was still out there somewhere. If he could, he'd have hired a ship and searched himself. He knew of many who would have joined him in the search until he'd found his friend. And brought him home.

So he could say goodbye.

But there was nothing he could do now. Beside him sat Tali'Zorah. He wasn't sure how many knew of the love she had for the Commander. And the love the Commander had for her in return. He wondered if Shepard had ever said anything. He had insisted she sit next to him during the service. He currently held her hand, trying to provide some sort of comfort, as she sat silently next to him.

He had spoken to the survivors. Most had little to say. Joker said little, and anything he did say was simply to blame himself for Shepard's loss. Liara spent most of her time trying to figure out who attacked them. Garrus talked of revenge on someone. Anyone. Wrex brooded silently. Alenko spoke of nothing but guilt.

Yet Tali was silent. She barely said two words to anyone, apart from those few words she said immediately after they were rescued, when she, of all people, calmed a tense situation. Since then she had barely spoken. Anderson didn't want to pry. He figured her grief would be far worse than anything than he was feeling. He remembered their conversation the day before the Commander had escaped with the _Normandy_ and the revelation of her feelings about her love for him. He assumed she had never said anything.

But he didn't want to pry. It wasn't the time or place.

And, in the end, it was simply too late.

Anderson listened as the minister spoke. He would have laughed if it was another occasion. He knew Shepard wasn't a particularly religious man, though he knew the Commander would have appreciated the gesture nonetheless. One of the many things he had learned about Shepard during the time he had known him is that he always kept an open mind. He figured the big guy upstairs wouldn't have held that against him. He figured he was probably already at the bar with Ashley, waiting for the rest of them to eventually arrive. He felt himself smile slightly at the thought.

Soon he found himself called to the stage. He had tried writing a eulogy. But he found it nearly impossible. He thought long and hard about what he would say. Many others had already spoken at length about his achievements and his life in general. He strode up the steps to the dais, put the datapad in front of him and looked out across the audience. He shuffled slightly. Cleared his throat.

It was time to say goodbye.

"Many of you in this audience know of the name Commander John Shepard. Famous soldier. An Alliance War Hero. And, in his final act, Saviour. Yet there are those of us here who were fortunate enough to know him as the man he was. Knew his heart. Knew his soul.

He could be utterly ferocious as a leader and commander. He had little fear in taking on the enemy head on. Yet he believed in a sense of justice. Of doing the right thing. He was a man anyone would be willing to follow. He was an example of all the good a human can be.

He was a leader.

Allied to that ferocious strength of spirit was an almost unbelievable kindness and generosity. Even now we hear of the acts the Commander has completed, not just on behalf of humanity, but the galaxy. His rescue of the helpless. His protection of the innocent. His understanding of all species. His love…

John Shepard was the most important thing I know he held dear.

Human.

Many would be startled to hear of his interests away from the battlefields and war that made up his life. He was a complex man at times and some found him difficult to understand. He enjoyed literature. Philosophy and politics.

But most importantly, and the one thing he always learned from, was history.

The nation he was from, back on Earth, was almost founded in warfare, an event called The Great War. It is said his fledgling nation found its strength of spirit in an ill-fated invasion of another. From the ashes of that defeat, a nation was brought together as one. That nation would commemorate their fallen soldiers each year from the end of that war. And it is a tradition that continues to do so until this day. During that commemoration, stanzas from a poem called 'For the Fallen' are always read. I know it was one of Shepard's favourite pieces. I know he spoke it himself every year in remembrance. I wish to speak that for him now.

Solemn the drums thrill: Death august and royal

Sings sorrow up into immortal spheres.

There is music in the midst of desolation

And a glory that shines upon our tears.

They went with songs to the battle, they were young,

Straight of limb, true of eye, steady and aglow.

They were staunch to the end against odds uncounted,

They fell with their faces to the foe.

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old;

Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.

At the going down of the sun and in the morning

We will remember them."

He cleared his throat and blinked rapidly as he felt the tears well in his eyes. This was much harder than he thought it would be.

Saying goodbye to his friend one last time.

He composed himself, closing his eyes, taking a deep breath, and another, before opening his eyes and staring out across the audience, all faces looking back at him. He looked over his team.

It would always be his team.

Tali, sat with head bowed, hands in her lap. Liara and Chakwas, their cheeks streaked with tears. Alenko and Joker, who both stared blankly back at Anderson. Garrus and Wrex, whose faces Anderson couldn't read, but he knew of their immense respect for their Commander. He knew of their sense of loss. It would have matched his own.

He took another deep breath.

"I will now ask Corporal Jenkins to approach the stage."

Jenkins stood and walked up the stairs to the stage. Anderson could see the look on the young Corporal's face, the redness around his eyes. The Corporal stopped for a moment once he'd ascended the stairs, taking a breath to compose himself, nodding slightly at Anderson, before he walked to the middle of the stage, turning and facing the crowd.

He brought the bugle to his lips.

The sounds of 'The Last Post' echoed around the silent auditorium. It was a tradition of Shepard's nation of birth. It was one of the few things he requested for his funeral. Despite its meaning, he couldn't help but think that the piece was… beautiful. It didn't not last long, the final notes escaping the bugle, the last note echoing around the auditorium as Jenkins put the bugle to his side and came to attention. Ranks of servicemen at the rear of the auditorium came to attention, saluting the fallen Commander. Anderson followed suit.

A moment's silence. Heads bowed. Everyone alone with their thoughts.

To remember the fallen.

Anderson looked around the audience a final time. He looked at his team.

It would always be his team.

"We will remember him."


	3. Connecting the Dots 3 - Say Goodbye II

Anderson and the once designated 'Spectre Squad' of the _Normandy_ were gathered together in the office of Barla Von. Each had received a message from the volus in the past 48 hours to gather at his temporary place of work, his office on the Presidium currently one of thousands under re-construction. No-one was quite sure why they had been summoned, only knowing that the volus handled Shepard's financial affairs. Anderson and Tali were sat in the two chairs available. Liara, Alenko, Garrus and Wrex stood behind them.

"I'm sure you're wondering why you're here," Barla Von began, "Aside from taking care of the Commander's financials, I also looked after any legal issues he had. He didn't really have any of those but I did receive a message from him on August 18th of this year."

Anderson's eyes widened in surprise. "That was the night before his arrival on Ilos. What was the message?"

"His last will and testament."

Most of the group glanced at each other in surprise.

"I'm not surprised," said Garrus, clearing his throat before he continued, "In one of our last chats before we arrived on Ilos, he said he figured the chances of him surviving were slim. I guess he just wanted to be prepared."

"What was the message exactly?" Anderson asked.

"It's a video message. He specifically asked that you were all assembled here before I played it."

The group looked at each other again. Everyone gave Anderson a brief nod.

"Play it."

The volus keyed his omni-tool, the large screen on the wall behind him flickering on. Shepard appeared on screen. Anderson heard Tali gasp. He reached over and held her hand. He heard the others shuffle behind him, believing they were coming to attention.

"If you're seeing this then I guess, to put it bluntly, I'm dead. First, I should get to the particulars:

My name is John William Shepard. I was born on April 11, 2154. I was born on Earth.

I am a Commander of the Alliance Navy.

I am currently Captain, though without the official rank, of the SSV Normandy.

I am a Council Spectre.

This is my last will and testament.

I actually don't really have much to say regarding my personal effects. My life has been the service since I was 18. Before that... well, we won't delve into that. But I don't have a personal residence and therefore don't really own a lot. Anything I do own should be found on the Normandy, either in my locker or in my quarters." They watched him grab a datapad and read from it. "According to my records, though, I currently have in my financial account a total of 5,567,182 credits."

Everyone gasped at that. No-one had any idea he was so… rich. They knew he'd have made plenty of money from all the salvage the _Normandy_ had found during their traverse across the galaxy. He was paid for the numerous jobs he completed either by the Alliance or other benefactors. He was still paid a salary by the Alliance in addition to all that. Still, Barla Von must have been a financial guru.

"Anderson, I'd like three million of that put aside to help the people of Feros. The colonists there are in need our continued support. However, this has to be via non-Alliance channels. I helped them in my role as a Spectre and they wish to remain outside the realm of the Alliance. I'm not exactly sure what the money can do but I'd like some sort of fund established so that they are cared for. They're good people and are more than deserving of our help.

As for the rest, split it between yourselves however you want. If you want to take a share, please do so. If you don't, then I understand. The only request I can make is that you use it for something good."

"We will, Shepard," said Anderson quietly.

"Right, now that's out of the way, we can get to what I want to talk about. My personal statements for my team." He stopped for a second, then shook his head. "Statements seems so... cold. No, not statements. A message. For each of you. My thoughts. About my colleagues. But you are all far more than just colleagues now. I see each of you as a friend. I hope you realised that during out time together. I hope you are all there to hear this. If you are all there, then at least I died making sure that my team, my friends, at the very least survived.

Wrex. All I can say is thank you for joining up. I will admit that I didn't know much about the krogan when you joined my team, but after our chats, I can only hope that you find your calling. And that I believe that if you were to return home, you may be one of the few able to bring the clans together and perhaps offer a brighter future for your people. It's just a thought. You have good ideas and, no matter what, you have my support. Just know that I'm proud to have called you a brother in arms. And a friend.

Liara. I can only say thank you for your unwavering trust and belief in me and the mission, and know that trust and belief was returned in full. Your help during the mission, particularly the hours and hours of research you completed, will be critical to our eventual success, and I also appreciated your courage on the battle-field. I only hope you can move on once our mission was complete and find happiness in whatever you choose to do next.

Kaidan. I'll keep this quite simple. I could think of no-one better to be the new Commander or Captain of the Normandy if I'm no longer there. Pressly is a damned fine officer and XO and I mean no disrespect to the man who has earned his position as my 2IC. But your quiet wisdom and strength of character made you a perfect confidant during times of crises and I believe you are more than worthy of an elevation in rank. But more importantly than that, you were a friend. I can only wish you the best of luck in the future, Kaidan.

Garrus. I couldn't think of anyone better to be watching my six than you. If there is a turian who is a tougher son of a bitch out there in the galaxy, then I never met him. I know we didn't always agree on things, but life would be boring if we had. I hope you have at least taken something away from the way I operate. Whatever the case, though, don't let it change the man you are. Like Wrex, I hope you find your calling. And know that I always considered you a close friend."

Shepard then went quiet, the group watching him lower his head, shuffling slightly, clearing his throat once or twice before he looked back up at the screen.

"Anderson. I could never, ever thank you enough for the impact you had on my life. For years I had nothing. No family. A few friends, using that term loosely, and no-one close or that I could trust. No-one to rely on. No-one at all. I was and felt completely alone. You were the first person to ever just… believe in me. Believe that I was capable of so much more. You were the inspiration, Anderson. You made me the man I am today. With your wisdom, your guidance and your support. And over time I looked to you as…" Shepard's voice cracked and he looked down again, taking a few breaths before looking back up, "I just hope I went out making you proud, sir."

Anderson nodded. "You did, son. You did," he said quietly.

Shepard then blew out his cheeks, silent again, appearing to gather his thoughts. "Finally, Tali. I have so much to say. So many things I wanted to say. There are things I wish I had said. The best day…" Shepard's voice broke immediately. He turned away from the camera and blew out his cheeks again. After a few moments, he turned back to the camera. No-one could miss the tear or two slowly cascading down his cheeks. "The best day of my life was meeting you, well, rescuing you, on the Citadel. Little did I know at the time of the impact that you would have on my life. Along with Anderson, you were the best thing…"

Shepard stopped again. Cleared his throat. Shuffled slightly in his chair.

"You were the best thing to ever happen in my life. With you at my side, I never felt alone. You were always there to help me, even in the darkest of times. I cannot thank you enough.

Tali, you are the most wonderful, selfless, intelligent, simply extraordinary person I met and it was my pleasure to have known you for these few short months. To have had you at my side. To have called you my friend. And I know that if you're hearing this, then I kept my promise – that you would live and that you would go on with your life. I'm just sorry that I can't be there, at your side, like you were at mine.

Just know that I… I always carried you with me, Tali. Two places. Here," as he pointed to his head, "but more importantly here," as he placed his hand over his heart. "That is how much you meant to me. My life was simply better just for having you in my life."

Tali simply cried quietly behind her mask, unable to say anything. Anderson wrapped an arm around her, others trying to give as much comfort as possible. Everyone was now more than aware of her feelings for Shepard, as they were aware of his feelings for her. They all knew she was completely devastated.

The video still played.

"I'm not really sure how I'm to end one of these things so I'll keep it simple. I'm glad I could call each and every one of you a friend and you all made me proud during our time together. I'm sure the mission will be a success and we'll keep the galaxy safe.

And, if I was wrong about the whole God thing, and the big guy upstairs decides to let me in, just know that I'll be watching and waiting for you up in heaven. I'll be at the bar with Ashley, having a drink. And don't bring your wallets when you arrive. Your money be worthless, all rounds being on me."

He smiled.

"Goodbye, my friends."

The screen turned black.


	4. Connecting the Dots 4 - I'll Begin Again

_A/N - Been updating on a Monday. Don't know why, tradition indicates I update on a Friday. So it's a return to said tradition!_

_Also, as mentioned in reviews, the first three chapters have been incredibly sad. I know, you know. But keep the faith, things will get brighter soon.:-)_

* * *

><p>The Councillor wasn't surprised but he was still angered by it. "Was this your decision?"<p>

The Admiral grimaced for a moment before shaking his head. "It was a joint decision of both the Parliament and the Navy, Councillor. But I thought I should be the one to come and tell you. I know how… close you are to some of them. The fact is that most of them are not part of the Alliance, and were only ever accepted due to the late Commander's status as a Spectre. Now that he is gone, we see no real reason to keep his team together. Orders regarding new assignments have already been sent to all Alliance personnel from the Normandy."

"Have his team been told?" The Admiral shook his head. "I will inform them, then."

"Are you sure?"

The Councillor nodded. "If anyone has to, I'd rather it come from me. They know and trust me. Plus, it will help if it comes from a friendly face."

The Admiral nodded in agreement and stood up, grabbing his trademark cap and placing it back on his head. The Councillor followed, walking around the desk and accepting the out-stretched hand. He didn't blame the Admiral for the decision. He understood the reasoning behind it. The Commander had been the one that had put the team together. Now that he was gone, and the mission to defeat Saren had been completed, which was the main reason behind the team in the first place, it was no real surprise that the team was now being broken up. Thanks for your help, but it is no longer required.

The two men walked to the door, the Admiral making to leave before he stopped and turned back to the Councillor. "How are you coping, Anderson? I know you two were close."

"It gets a little easier with each day."

The Admiral was quiet for a moment, appearing to chew over the next question. "Did you honestly believe him? His unshakable belief in what he foretold was to happen?"

Anderson didn't have to ask about what the Admiral was referring. "I never doubted him, Admiral. There is no doubt in my mind that we should be preparing right now for an invasion. It may not happen tomorrow, next month or next year. But the time of reckoning is upon us. We have been warned. But already my call to arms falls on deaf ears." He shrugged. "I'll continue to do what I can. Our very survival is at stake."

The Admiral nodded. "You have my support, Admiral. I trusted the man as well. But…," he trailed off, simply giving a shrug of his shoulders to indicate his own lack of success.

Anderson just sighed, shaking his head. "I understand, Admiral. All we can do is hope and prepare for the best."

The two men shook hands again, and with sincere farewells, the Admiral walked down the corridor. Anderson walked back to his desk and opened his terminal. After thinking for a few moments, he started typing.

The next day, Anderson stood in front of the team. Events had clearly taken its toll on most of them, having never seen a more downcast bunch of people in his life. The rescue then the funeral had been one thing. But it was the last time they had gathered together, at the reading of his last will and testament, which had left everyone well and truly devastated. Of realising just how much each of them had meant to the man. It made what he was about to announce even worse.

"How are you all?" he asked as an ice-breaker. He received a bunch of shrugged shoulders, murmurs of 'doing fine' but not much else. He understood, giving the same sort of response to the question whenever he was asked by others.

"Why have we been summoned, Councillor?" Garrus asked, "Though, I must admit, we've already discussed why we are here between ourselves."

"You have?" Anderson asked, not particularly surprised.

"Unfortunately we can already take a guess why we're here, Councillor," stated Liara, "We've already been made aware of the new orders received by the Alliance regarding their own personnel. Kaidan has been nice enough to get in touch and let us know he'll be leaving the Citadel within the week. Doctor Chakwas also informed us of the new role she'll be taking up shortly as well."

Anderson couldn't help but grin slightly. _They'll always be a team._ "Do I need to explain the reasons why?" He received a bunch of shaken heads in response.

"He was the reason we came together," Tali stated with a sigh, Anderson not failing to notice the sad tone, if not body language, she clearly showed, "Now that he's gone…," she trailed off, shrugging her shoulders, "We understand."

Liara added to the depression with a sigh of her own. "I guess we just have to accept that it's time to move on with our own lives."

Anderson nodded. He would have to do the same. He turned around to switch off his terminal. "Why don't we all go and get a drink?"

* * *

><p>The docking bay was relatively quiet as Anderson and the team sat waiting for the various transports to arrive, or waiting for an announcement of another departure. Events had moved quickly since the team had been told their services would no longer be required. To say that they were all eager to get on with their lives without the Commander would be a lie, but they accepted the reality of the situation.<p>

The team had come together one final time the night before. It had been a solemn affair at first, though once the drinks had started to flow, the conversation and laughter, of remembering their time together, started once again. Everyone from the _Normandy_ had attended, understanding that it would likely be the final time they would all be together.

Anderson wasn't surprised to hear that none of them really knew what to do with themselves now that they had their own lives to get on with. Each still believed the threat was real but they understood there was next to nothing they could do about it alone. Each knew it was up to Anderson to bang the drum. And the defeat of Sovereign meant that, for the time being at least, the threat had diminished significantly. Perhaps they had time on their side. Time to prepare for when, not if, the threat finally arrived. No-one was under any illusion otherwise. They had simply bought time. Whether they would ever have enough to truly prepare for what lay on the horizon was another question altogether.

So the team simply conversed quietly, enjoying their last moments together. Wrex was the first to depart. He seemed sincere in his farewells to his team-mates, and Anderson was sure he was on to greater things. Talk was that he would be giving up his life as a mercenary and would be heading back to Tuchanka. At least that was the rumour. Anderson had spoken to the krogan at length and believed him when he said he wanted to unite his people in pursuit of peace. He wished him the best of luck. But knew that he was also on a long and difficult road.

Next to depart was Liara. She had explained that she was unsure what she was going to do. The thought of returning to a dig-sit alone no longer held the same thrill after the time she had spent with the Commander. She had discussed with Anderson the threat on the horizon and wondered what she could do to help. So her first port of call would be the asari home-world of Thessia. From there, who knew what the future would hold for her. But, for some reason, Anderson doubted it would be about archaeology.

Garrus was a whole different story. Thoughts of returning to C-Sec disappeared with the death of the Commander. Anderson had dealt with plenty of turians and couldn't remember a time when he'd met one more… bitter. Or angry. He knew the Commander and the turian had grown close, despite their obvious differences. He was left wondering where the turian would be heading. Even he couldn't really explain his plans. All he said was that he 'needed to get away.' Perhaps he would head to Palaven or a turian colony world? Anderson offered him work whenever he wanted. The turian thanked him but said he would be okay.

That left Anderson and Tali alone together. He just turned and hugged her tightly. She was his last connection to him, as he was to her. He knew they would miss each other for that reason alone.

"Will you be okay?" She just nodded her head silently. "Will you keep in touch?"

She moved back slightly, looking up at him. "I don't know. Part of me just wants to forget…," she said quietly.

"You'll always have a friend on the Citadel, Tali. Any time you want help, or simply someone to talk to, I'll be here."

He could see she smiled slightly by how her eyes moved behind the mask. "I know. And thank you, Anderson." She paused for a second. "It's nice to know I'll have friends out there. But keeping in touch… It will be difficult. This really is it."

"You're happy enough returning to the fleet?"

Tali shrugged. "I was always bound to return eventually. Even in my wildest dreams I didn't think…," she sighed and trailed off, Anderson simply nodding in understanding, "My pilgrimage is over. I guess…," she sighed again, "I guess I'll just have to get on with my life. It's just going to seem so dull compared to…," she again fell into silence.

"Life was like that with him, wasn't it?" he asked, a slight smile, instantly remembering their times together in the Navy.

She chuckled ever so slightly. "I know I said that I want to forget. But I never will. He'll always be the one. How could anyone else possibly compare?"

The two hugged a final time. "Goodbye, Anderson," she said quietly, and with a final nod, she turned and walked away towards her shuttle, disappearing through the docking bay doors.

"Goodbye, Tali," Anderson said quietly to himself.

He suddenly felt very alone. This chapter of his life was over. He knew he'd miss his friend for the rest of his life.

But it was time to move on.

* * *

><p><em>AN - I've had these prologues written since before I finished the previous story (that's how far ahead I plan!) so I'll probably upload a chapter every few days (twice a week) as I figure you all want to get into the story proper._


	5. Connecting the Dots 5 - Deeds Not Words

The landscape out the window of the shuttle was a barren wasteland, a testament to the futility of nuclear war. The technological advances made by the krogan were, in the end, a monumental disaster. The technology gave them entirely new ways of killing each other. At one time, the krogan had been the saviours of the galaxy, their century's long war against the rachni proving their prowess in battle. But then there were the Rebellions, in response to those was the unleashing of the genophage, and the near destruction of the krogan race.

Tuchanka was nothing but piles of rubble, an absolute battered land, barely worth fighting over. The once garden world was something only talked about in whispers, only remembered by those krogan who still lived fromt that time, otherwise it was a past consigned to the history books. No-one thought the world would ever flourish once more. Tuchanka was now considered one of the deadliest planets in the galaxy. Apart from the krogan inhabitants, any flora and fauna that had survived the nuclear fallout was deadly to any potential visitors. Then there was the atmosphere, the ozone layer that once covered the planet completely destroyed, and the Shard, the giant tower built by the salarians, the only thing keeping the planet liveable.

Wrex sat alone in the shuttle as it started its descent. It had been centuries since he last set foot on the home-world. He had washed his hands of his people for years, simply focusing on his own life and gave an air of being uncaring about the plight of his people. But, deep in his heart, he had always cared greatly about his people. About their plight. Their standing in the pantheon of galactic races. It had been during his conversations with Shepard that he had realised that perhaps, just perhaps, he should return home. And help lead his people out of the plight they suffered. Wrex remembered the promise Shepard had made on Virmire, of helping the krogan find a cure for the genophage.

Krogan rarely felt great sadness, but the thought of Shepard gave Wrex pause. It had now been months since Shepard had been lost, the unknown ship blasting the _Normandy_ apart, Shepard blown clear of the wreckage. He had attended the funeral, out of respect for his fellow warrior, though his body had never been found. Once the funeral was finished, the rest of the crew had been split up by the Alliance, the human Councillor, a close friend of the late Commander, the one to inform them of the end. He was saddened to be split from them; he had learned to appreciate them all, and considered them friends, even Garrus, despite krogan mistrust of all turians. He had a particular soft spot for the young quarian, Tali, who he noticed had developed quite a bond with Shepard, and had appeared utterly heartbroken at the funeral.

During his time on the _Normandy_, and in the months since the funeral, Wrex had quietly established contacts on Tuchanka, trying to find like-minded individuals and clans, who would support his drive and ideas. Wrex had an ambitious plan. End the clan feuds. Unite Tuchanka as one, under the flag of Clan Urdnot. And finally bring an end to the genophage and the end of krogan isolation from the rest of the galactic races.

Establishing dominance of his clan would be difficult enough. His brood-brother, Wreav, had been left in charge since Wrex had left, and Clan Urdnot had become an embarrassing shell of what it once was. Wrex thought his brother was an idiot, always had, and it was the one regret he had about originally leaving Tuchanka, knowing that his brother could one day lay claim to leadership. Wrex was prepared to fight and kill his brother, if necessary, but from news he had already been told, Wrex would have the support of the clan on his return. It appeared becoming an infamous bounty hunter, and also a member of the crew that saved the Citadel, and quite possibly the galaxy, may help him re-establish control. It also helped that most were unhappy with the ineffectiveness of Wreav's leadership.

The shuttle finally landed on Tuchanka, Wrex opening the door and setting foot on Tuchankan soil for the first time in hundreds of years. He bent down to one knee and grabbed a handful of soil, letting it run through his fingers, before he rubbed his hands together and stood up, looking around at the wasteland that greeted his eyes.

_It's a hell-hole. Barely worth fighting over. But it's home._

_Our home._

_My home._

Two krogan walked up the pile of rubble towards where Wrex waited in front of the shuttle. Arms were crossed diagonally across their chests in salute, a slight bow as they spoke. "Urdnot Wrex, welcome home to Tuchanka."

Wrex returned the gesture before he walked forward, arms spread wide. "I am pleased to return home, brothers."

The two krogan fell in alongside Wrex as the trio walked down the rubble mound. In front of them on an open square were lines of krogan. There must have been hundreds of them. Proud warriors, one and all. Wrex's proclamations had apparently reached all corners of Tuchanka. The krogan lined up in front of him were but a fraction of those in support of Wrex and his ideas.

"These are the leaders and members of the clans who wish to pursue peace? Who truly want an end to the genophage? But also to end the cycle of violence? And those that wish to see the krogan re-integrate themselves within the galaxy?" asked Wrex.

"Indeed they are, Urdnot Wrex. There are still many clans who would oppose your ideas, but the clans represented here are aware of your history and the fall-out with your father. Many of the krogan in front of you now have always supported your ideals, but have simply had to await your return. Most clans are not strong enough to go alone."

"Most importantly, Urdnot Wrex. We have had enough of this," making a gesture at the bleak landscape surrounding them, "We want something more. Enough is enough. It has gone on far too long."

Wrex grumbled slightly. He had always resented the way he had retreated from Tuchanka. But when most of his finest warriors were murdered by his father, Wrex had been left with little choice but to leave in desperation. But not without getting revenge on his father first, leaving him dead on the ground, a knife buried deep in his heart.

Wrex came to a stop in front of the rows of krogan, standing shoulder to shoulder in a large square, as he stood on a small mound of rubble overlooking them. They all gave the same gesture, arm across the chest, a slight bow. "You honour us, Urdnot Wrex," they said as one. Wrex gave a slight bow in return. He was surprised at the respect. Then again, news of Virmire, his role in defeating Saren, of his promise to end the genophage, had reached Tuchanka. It was one of many reasons why so many clans had been willing to join. There was one word at the back of all their minds. Of his mind. He was promising to give the krogan the one thing they had lacked for over a thousand years.

Hope.

He paced slightly in silence for a moment in front of them, gathering his thoughts.

"I see before me row upon row of krogan warriors. You should each be standing there, chests filled out with pride. You represent some of the best of our race. I should be standing here now, addressing you with similar pride, to see each of you before me, ready to fight and die for an ideal. Not just my ideal. An ideal that every krogan should strive for. But the idea of pride itself for a krogan is nothing but a dream. For now.

Yet the krogan were once a proud people. At our apex, we were a people that the galaxy once relied on, to fight on their behalf. We were their protectors. And it was a role we should have relished. But it was senselessly wasted. We once lived,fought and died by the ideals of courage, strength and honour. But for the last thousand years, we have done nothing but waste our lives. With the senseless slaughter of each other. The futile clan wars. A complete lack of progress as a species.

I say no more. No more shall we wallow in the mire. No longer shall we blame the genophage for our lack of progress. No more shall we let our petty disputes blight our future. No longer shall we blame others for our own stupidity.

Today, we begin our rebirth. Today, we start the rise of the krogan once again. But no longer will be a species to be feared. No longer will we terrorise those who oppose use. We will earn our right as a species to be respected, as we will once again earn our place in the galaxy as a member of the galactic community. We must come together as one people, living by those ideals which we once cherished. To which we once aspired. To which we must aspire once again.

Today, we will lead the krogan into a new future. Brighter than ever before. The last thousand years should soon be no more than nothing but a bad dream. We should not forget. We shall never forget. But it is time to move on. We shall roll up our sleeves and get to work. Re-energise. Rebuild. Renew. It is time for a new start. A new dawn.

That is my solemn promise, my vow, to you all, my brothers."

The assembled krogan roared their approval. Wrex allowed himself a slight grin. He figured Shepard would have been proud of that one. Wrex looked up into the sky, the sun beating down on the battered landscape of Tuchanka. He let another small grin cross his face.

_You would be proud. I remember your promise. __But I will continue to make you proud, my brother. For the krogan, but also in your name, do I return here and fight._

He returned his attention to the assembled ranks of krogan in front of him. His new band of brothers. Krogan who were willing to work, fight and die for Wrex and his ideals.

"Come, my brothers. Let us begin."


	6. Connecting the Dots 6 - I Believe

The alcohol burned his throat on the way down as it started to settle in his stomach, the usual warmth spreading through his body as he closed his eyes and slowly exhaled. He knew he probably looked terrible. He knew he probably had a problem. He chuckled, though bitterly, to himself. _Well, it's not a problem. I__f only they knew how I really felt, though. He shouldn't have died. It wasn't right. It wasn't fair. And what's happened since then..._ He shook his head of that train of thought. It simply wasn't healthy. It usually made him angry. And wouldn't lead anywhere except another glass.

Kaidan Alenko had been wracked by only one feeling for nearly the past year since the _Normandy_ had blown up in space, high above Alchera. In the carnage that followed, the Commander had been lost, his body never found. After a paltry search, the man had been simply written of as killed in action, a funeral service held, his team split up before his empty casket was even put in the ground back on Earth. Through all of that, still that one feeling remained.

Guilt.

He shook his head, feeling the bitterness consume him again. He still couldn't believe that despite surviving the loss of the Commander, a man that he and his companions had chosen to follow, true believers in the Reaper threat, that he found himself promoted by the Alliance. He knew why he'd been promoted. The Commander had written glowing performance reviews about him during their time together. He had recommended him for his own command. Alenko knew, in return, that he would have followed the Commander across the galaxy in his quest if he had asked.

He figured the promotion was also to buy his silence, to stop him beating the drum about the Reaper threat. The Council had spent at least the past year, and even at times while the Commander was alive, denying the existence of the Reapers, claiming again and again that the build up of forces and subsequent attack on the Citadel had been the work of Saren and the geth alone, and that _Sovereign_ had only been a geth dreadnought, never seen before or since. Alenko couldn't remember a greater cover-up.

_Fools! Blind, misguided fools. How much more evidence do they need to understand there is a threat out there?_

The team Alenko had worked with so closely during his time on the _Normandy_ had been broken up not long after the funeral. He had little idea where any of them were now. Joker was probably piloting a new craft, though he remember the pilot being left a bitter and broken man with the loss of both his ship and Commander. There were even rumours that he had been grounded. Tali would have returned to the Migrant Fleet, Alenko grimacing as he remembered the funeral. As for the rest, he could only assume that Liara, Garrus and Wrex had returned home. All were believers in Shepard, but with the man now gone, they had to resume their own lives as best they could.

Alenko observed the crowds going about their daily lives as he sat in the bar on the Citadel, a lovely little place he had once discovered with Shepard on the Presidium, during one of their brief escapes from the _Normandy_ as they chased Saren across the galaxy. He almost laughed at them, all completely unaware of the very real threat that lay on the horizon. His eyes were relatively unfocused, simply scanning the crowds walking by and he barely registered the man that took a seat beside him.

"Alenko," stated the man, the deep voice booming in his ears.

"Councillor," replied Alenko, turning his head as Anderson stared back at him. The one-time Captain had aged considerably in his role as Councillor. He had been chosen by Shepard, after the Battle of the Citadel, to be humanity's representative on the Council. Humanity's reward for its sacrifice in defending the Council and the Citadel from Saren, the geth and Sovereign. His once dark hair was greying and his face was streaked with ever more lines. Alenko knew Anderson was a believer in the Reaper threat. He was also aware of the close relationship that he and Shepard once shared, and knew he was hurting as much as anyone else. If not more...

"You look like hell, Alenko."

He released another bitter laugh as he rubbed his unshaven cheek. "Is it that obvious, sir?"

Anderson didn't reply, instead standing and disappearing from view for a moment, before returning with his own glass tumbler and a bottle. He poured himself a glass of amber liquid, gesturing to Alenko to hold out his own, which he did. Alenko placed the tumbler back on the bar and simply stared into the liquid, as Anderson threw back his own glass, closing his eyes as he appeared to savour the taste himself. He put the tumbler back on the bar and looked at Alenko again.

"How are you really?" he asked. Kaidan thought he sounded genuinely concerned.

"As well as can be expected, sir…" Alenko answered before trailing off.

"Don't give me that crap, Alenko. You've barely been yourself since Shepard was lost."

"How should I feel? You believed in Shepard just as much as I did. Yet all I did when we were under attack was get in the life-pod."

"You were following orders, Alenko. Like any trained soldier should do."

"But I could have done something!"

"What would have you done? Die as well? Alenko…" Anderson turned towards him, softened his voice. "Kaidan, you're not doing yourself any favours by wallowing in self-pity and letting the guilt eat at you. I can assure you, nothing could have been done to save Shepard. I've read the reports. I know, and you know, it wasn't the geth. Just like we know that it wasn't just the geth who attacked the Citadel."

"Yet the rest of the Council do nothing!" he almost shouted in reply, banging his fist on the table, causing the glasses to jump slightly. He immediately let out a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He continued in a quieter voice, "The only thing the other three on the Council have achieved is to destroy Shepard's reputation and smear his name, at least in private, regarding anything to do with the Reapers. They make him sound like a mad-man, sir. Almost as bad as Saren. It's not right. It's not how the man should be remembered."

"So we carry on the fight, Alenko. I can assure you, I'm doing as much as I can regarding the Council. I'm continually fighting his corner, but it's a losing cause. They simply don't want to believe. And while I appreciate Shepard nominating me, I'm no diplomat. As much as I have no time for Udina, he would have been the better choice. He knows how to play the game at least. But I do the best I can. Though all I continually do is butt heads with the other three, at least as far as Sparatus and Valern. Tevos is usually the peacemaker between us three, but I can tell that even she has little time for me and what I believe."

"So what should I do, sir? I know what I've seen. I know what I believe as well. Yet it feels almost pointless carrying on the fight. No-one else believes. Not with Shepard gone. It's like a nightmare. I feel like I'm going crazy at times."

"Do what you do best, Alenko. Be the best goddamned soldier you can be. That's what Shepard would have wanted. He believed in you in return."

"I know," stated Alenko quietly, before he turned to Anderson, "How do you do it?"

Anderson stared straight ahead for a moment. Alenko could see the grief in his face, in his eyes, in his body language. Even after all this time, he could see Anderson had been left devastated by the loss of his friend. It got easier… but not by much.

"I remember the man he was," he replied quietly. The pair sat in silence for a moment, staring out at the landscape of the Presidium, enjoying the peace while it lasted, not knowing how long they had left until it was well and truly shattered. "I have a job for you, Commander," stated Anderson, breaking the silence, "Completely confidential. Out in the Terminus Systems and in and around the Traverse."

Alenko raised an eyebrow. "The Terminus Systems? What do the Alliance want out there?"

"There's a threat out there somewhere, Commander. Something other than the Reapers. The Alliance want to start protecting the colonies, even those who don't want to fall under the Alliance flag. We're already sending crews out to the colonies, putting defences in place to ensure all of humanity is protected, particularly those who have been left undefended."

Alenko nodded. "You can count me in. When do I start?"

"Ship is leaving in 48 hours. You'll be in command. Technically, you'll be in charge of a small team. But much of the work you will be doing alone." Alenko nodded his head, silence descending upon the pair again. "You know it's Shepard's birthday today," said Anderson, sadness radiating from his voice.

Alenko nodded. "I remember."

Anderson grabbed the bottle again, filling each glass tumbler to the brim with amber liquid. Once filled, he put down the bottle, handing one tumbler to Alenko, taking the other for himself. He lifted his glass in a gesture of salute.

"To Shepard. God rest his soul," Anderson stated quietly, downing the liquid in one clean movement.

Alenko lifted his own glass.

"To Shepard."


	7. Connecting the Dots 7 - The Burden

_A/N - I know some of my regulars are not big fans of this character but she is still an important part of the story (although not so much regarding this second stanza). :-)_

* * *

><p>Skyscrapers reached for the sky like trees in the forest climbing for sunlight. The lights from the thousands of billboards dotted the skyline and further down into the slums, drowning out the darkness. Down below, thousands of people went about their daily lives, scurrying about, business deals to be completed, returning to their homes and loved ones. Or to commit the numerous crimes that were carried out each day. Above, the sky was a dark shade of purple as the sun set in the distance.<p>

Life was quiet on the 25th floor of the office building in which Liara T'Soni was currently standing, looking out the window as she observed people go about their lives. She put a hand to the window for a moment, almost feeling the thickness of the glass, knowing it could stop nearly every sort of bullet currently in production. That was what her life had become. Behind on the desk sat a terminal, the screen continuously scrolling as information arrived from all corners of the galaxy. Information that was bought and sold. Information that would help in her fight against her numerous foes. Information that would help in the battle that was to come. Next to the terminal sat a glass tumbler, filled with an amber liquid, the ice cubes within causing condensation to run down the sides of the glass and pool on the desk.

She lowered her hand and simply looked into the window and her reflection. She could barely stand to look at herself anymore. The innocent, wide-eyed asari that had once been rescued by Commander Shepard had slowly but surely disappeared in the months since he had been lost. Instead, a constant frown was etched on her face as she continuously fought the pangs of guilt she felt with each passing day.

She felt guilt for numerous reasons. Since the crew of the _Normandy_ had been split up, she had fallen out of contact with all her fellow crew members. She was aware that Tali was back with the Migrant Fleet. Just the thought of her quarian friend caused overwhelming sadness. Liara had been attracted to the Commander during the search for Saren, but the Commander had either remained unaware, or was not interested. Liara had given plenty of hints of her own interest in him, but eventually gave up. The Commander had certainly been friendly with Tali, and the two had been very close, but it was clear to all that Tali had wanted more. Liara grimaced as she remembered Tali falling apart in the life-pod, and the funeral, as her true feelings had been revealed to all.

As for the rest, she had information but chose to stay out of contact. Wrex was back on Tuchanka and once again in charge of Clan Urdnot. She knew he was trying to band together all the krogan tribes under his banner. She knew he was also doing only because of his talks with Shepard. From the information she had gathered, he was making steady progress. Probably not as fast as he would have liked, but progress it was. She wished him well. Councillor Anderson was the only one of the four Citadel Councillors who still took the Reaper threat seriously. However, the Council had otherwise whitewashed the Reaper threat, bizarrely claiming that _Sovereign_ was merely a geth warship, despite all evidence to the contrary. Liara would have liked to help the Councillor, but knew any efforts would be fruitless. Kaidan Alenko had returned to Alliance duties, and was aware that he had received a promotion, mostly thanks to the Commander, but he was now involved in a number of classified Alliance missions. Liara was able to find out what they were, but again chose to stay out of contact. The only member of the _Normandy_ she was unaware of was Garrus. He had simply disappeared after the funeral. He had not returned to C-Sec and she could not find him serving anywhere on Palaven. She had heard rumours of a vigilante operating on Omega, and had started putting out feelers.

But then there was Shepard himself. As far as the Council, Alliance and galaxy was concerned, the Commander was dead. His ship had been destroyed in an attack and his body had been either burned up in the atmosphere of Alchera, or had been lost forever, drifting alone through space. The Hero of Humanity and Saviour of the Citadel was an unfortunate victim of a geth attack.

But Liara knew the real truth.

After his funeral and the break-up of the team, she had made contact with the Illusive Man, the leader of the human terrorist group known as Cerberus. She remembered the name well, at least as far as Shepard's near one-man war against the shadowy organisation. Liara was left wondering why Cerberus were interested in meeting with her, and particularly why they were concerned about Shepard, considering he had spent a considerable amount of time wiping out their operations, during the search for Saren. The Illusive Man made a convincing argument, one with which she had to agree. Shepard represented everything great about humanity, and his body should be back in human hands. The one real reason Liara agreed was the last point.

Cerberus could bring Shepard back to life.

Liara had met with a drell by the name of Feron, a double-agent for the Shadow Broker. Together they investigated sources indicating that Shepard's body had been found on Alchera, and was currently being transported to a Shadow Broker base, on the planet of Alingon. Liara, along with Feron, put together a small force of mercenaries to retrieve the Commander's body. It had been a long and bloody fight, with all other mercenaries killed, while Feron had been captured by Shadow Broker. He had fought them to a standstill, while demanding that Liara escape with the Commander's body.

Liara escaped, and handed over Shepard's body to Miranda Lawson, in charge of the Lazarus Project, whose only objective was to bring Shepard back to life. Liara still remembered opening the sarcophagus that held the body of Shepard when she was on the ship, reeling back in horror. His body was a blackened, charred mess. And unrecognisable as the man she had once harboured feelings for. She wondered how Cerberus could possibly return it to life. She shivered at the memory.

And then there was Feron. Liara was still unsure as to who his allegiance truly lay. He had often used double-speak and distraction when the two conversed, but the fact he had no compunction eliminating the forces of the Shadow Broker, Liara could only imagine what sort of torture he was suffering now. If he was even still alive. Liara had promised herself that she would do everything she could to get him back.

Liara turned away from the window and sat back down in her comfortable leather chair, looking at the screen as information continued to scroll down. She pressed a series of buttons on the keyboard and a new window opened up. A medical bay was displayed. She recognised Miranda straight away, while two doctor's worked on a body.

Shepard's body.

Liara grinned to herself ever so slightly. Progress was being made, it seemed. But there was still a long way to go. Then there were all the questions – would he live? Would he still the same man? Would Cerberus do anything to change the man he was? There were no answers, but far too many questions. She still wondered if she had done the right thing.

Then she thought about Tali again. She wondered if she send her a message. Let her know what she had done. Part of her wanted to every single morning as she walked into the office. But she didn't want to get her hopes up. She remembered how distraught her friend had been at his death. She wondered if hope enough would return Shepard to them. She hoped herself, but in the end, each time, she chose not to contact her. Not just yet. She wanted to be sure, to know that he truly was alive, then she would contact her. That was her promise to herself.

Liara reached across the desk and picked up the glass tumbler, taking a long sip of the amber liquid. Whiskey. It burned her throat on the way day. She felt a warmth spread through her body as she placed the glass back down. It was one of the few things she had taken away from her time on the _Normandy_. She had not forgotten anything, or anyone. She just chose not to remember. Fond memories they were. But they were now a weakness. A way to exploit her.

Liara returned her attention to the terminal and the report she had been writing. She knew her life boarded on two obsessions. Two burdens, both of which she had chosen to carry alone. She wondered if one would call her selfish for this obsession and how she chose to fight. She wondered if she was doing the right thing. One obsession was the Reapers. She knew what Shepard had known. She knew what was coming. She knew that the galaxy was staring extinction in the face, yet buried their heads in the sand. But there was one other obsession. It was of someone whom she had never lain eyes on. But it was someone who seemed to have a finger in every pie around the galaxy. And it was someone who had desperately tried to involve himself in her business. She now had the money, information and resources available to search for him in return. To find him. And eventually kill him.

It was the name written at the top of the report she was currently writing.

The Shadow Broker.


	8. Connecting the Dots 8 - Defenders

_A/N - Phil, hope and ye shall receive!_

* * *

><p>The dozen men were gathered around the small table, on which sat only a map of the surrounding area. The leader of these men looked upon his followers, almost like a proud father. They were men of many race and creed – turian, human, salarian, even a batarian had joined the ranks. The dozen men were dressed in combat armour. But on each man was no official insignia. Their armour shared only the same colour. Some would have considered them simple mercenaries, as they fought with no army, representing no race or people. However, these men fought for no pay or personal glory. They fought to protect the innocent, and served justice to the guilty. They considered themselves just, if not righteous, in their cause.<p>

They saw themselves as the protectors of Omega.

Garrus Vakarian had arrived on the space station months before, a broken man. Shepard was gone. The man he would have followed through hell itself, the man he considered one of, if not his best friend, had been lost. Garrus believed the Reaper threat was real, but when the Alliance split up his team, once Shepard had been 'buried', Garrus chose to disappear, and do something worthwhile with his life. Follow the example Shepard had set. At least that is what he thought. Or hoped.

He figured that returning to C-Sec would have been pointless. He'd already handed in his badge, and couldn't face returning to the hum-drum of Citadel life. He remembered the reputation he had garnered for himself while an officer, and assumed the Executor wouldn't want him back anyway, despite that one time offer which seemed so long ago. At one point he contemplated seeing if he could join the ranks of the Spectres, but figured it was unlikely he would be recruited. The only other option had been returning to Palaven and the military. But that would also have included returning home to face his father. Something he didn't relish. And he bristled at the thought of military life once again. It just wasn't for him.

He was left to wonder, every so often, how the old team was getting on. Joker and Alenko no doubt continued their careers in the Alliance. He guessed Liara may have returned to her roots and Tali was back with the Migrant Fleet. As for Wrex, he wasn't so sure. He had listened into the conversations between the krogan and Shepard. Garrus had to admit that he still thought the genophage was the right thing to do at the time, but during their time together, he had grown to think of Wrex as a friend, and there was a small pang of guilt whenever he thought of him and the life he led. He did wonder what he was up to now, if he had returned to Tuchanka to lead his people.

Garrus cleared his throat, the eyes of the other 11 men on him, falling silent as he started to speak. Like usual, the instructions would be short, sharp and precise. He trusted his men implicitly. And they trusted him with their lives in return.

"The mercenaries are located in a warehouse here," stated Garrus, pointing at the map, "Butler and Krul, you will take up a sniping position here. Weaver and Erash, you will take up a sniping position here. You'll provide us with cover and can eliminate any resistance not located within the building. The other 8 of us will infiltrate the warehouse. The main door is located here. There are side doors located here, here and here, where we can enter. We will split into two teams of four. I assume you have all learned the lay-out of the warehouse?"

11 heads nodded.

"Expected resistance?" asked Sensat, the lone batarian. Garrus was surprised when he offered his services. But he'd proven his worth. He was a skilled fighter and worthy of being part of his team.

"Up to 20 to 30 enemy combatants will be within the warehouse. They have no heavy weaponry. Expect only light opposition. Our objective is but one: We will enter, kill and exit as quickly as possible. However, we will leave fireworks once we've departed. Our usual departing gift. Mierin, that's where you come in. You have the package?"

The salarian nodded. An original recruit. One that Garrus trusted most. Ex-STG. And a tough son of a bitch.

"Good."

"Are we taking prisoners for interrogation?" asked Monteague, a human mercenary who had joined their cause not many weeks before, having lost everything he owned and loved to a band of mercs. One of many looking for their own sort of revenge.

"No," replied Garrus.

11 nodded their heads in agreement. It was the standard mission then.

"Any other questions?"

All remained silent.

"Good. Everyone clear regarding our objective?"

11 heads nodded.

"Grab your armour and gear. We leave in five minutes."

Garrus and his team were as silent as the wind as they made their way to the warehouse, using the shadows to their advantage. It was the same tactical plan. No-one would see them come or go. There would be the sound of gunfire, but that was not usual on Omega. Barely a day went by when there were not bodies found in the streets and avenues, all over the station. Omega was completely and utterly lawless. The only person Garrus knew who could even begin to bring a semblance of law and order was Aria T'Loak, and Garrus had no time for her either, considering she was the designated 'Pirate Queen' and undisputed ruler of Omega. Therefore, groups, such as those Garrus continuously fought, thrived on the misery of others. There was slavery, drug dealing, and murder. Utter corruption and debasement of the population. Garrus took pleasure in cleaning up the place. It seemed like a futile effort at times, but he wouldn't give up. Not as long as there was blood in his veins and air in his lungs.

With the snipers in position, Garrus and his team waited at the side of the warehouse. The crack of rifles soon echoed in the air. There were no cries for help. The men he had chosen were expert shots. They never missed. Silence soon descended again.

"All clear," came the call through his earpiece.

With only two hand movements, Garrus and his team split up as planned. They would flank the opposition, forcing them back into the main floor of the warehouse, where Garrus hoped to then mop up any resistance that remained. It was a simple plan. Not particularly astute. But he found opposing mercenaries were usually quite dumb.

He walked quickly, in a slightly crouching position, to the door, gesturing to the man behind him to the other side. He grabbed the doorknob and looked at Sidonis. His fellow turian looked back and nodded. Garrus flung the door open inwards and moved in, rifle raised, searching for targets. The hallway was dark and empty.

Garrus gestured to the doors to his side, two by two as the men searched for the enemy. He opened one door to see two men sat watching a vid-screen. They hadn't heard them enter. He gestured to Sidonis for quiet, the two creeping up behind the men, taking out the knife that sat at their hips. He grabbed one of the men by the mouth, preventing him screaming out, while plunging the knife into his neck. The struggle didn't last long as he let the body drop to the floor, bending down to wipe the knife before sheathing it.

The quiet didn't last, though, as soon gunfire echoed around the warehouse.

"Go loud," he ordered as they started walking quickly through the hallways. Doors were kicked in, rifles fired at anyone who moved. Anyone who ran towards them was mown down by rifle fire. He tried keeping count of the bodies but it was pointless. He knew they were approaching the planned killing field. He guessed that that the opposition would fall back for one last stand.

He approached a closed door, peering through the small glass pane. It was the main warehouse floor. Just as planned. He could see the remnants of the mercenary force trying to dig in. He could hear shouts of concern. He heard the one question that was always asked.

"Who the fuck is attacking us?" someone would ask.

"It must be Archangel," would be the reply.

Garrus looked back at his men and nodded. He opened the door and ran onto the warehouse floor, taking cover behind a crate. He waited until he knew his three colleagues were with him, and then they opened fire.

"Team 2 in position," came the call over the radio.

The mercenaries would now be pinned from a different angle. Smart enough to fire from two sides, not dumb enough so they end up shooting each other. Tactics 101, as far as he was concerned.

"Team 3 in position," came another call.

Those were the snipers, now taking position outside the warehouse door, preventing any escape. Never give the enemy a get-out.

Garrus would consider cease-fire as an option, giving the mercenaries a chance. But he remembered what happened on Nepheron and the morons from Cerberus, the olive branch Shepard offered, thrown back in his face. He would offer no olive branch. He never offered. These scumbags deserved what was coming to them. As far as he was concerned, they all did. His life was easy. Black and white. Good versus evil.

"Maintain pressure," he ordered.

The gunfire was incessant. Grenades exploded. He could hear the telltale noises of tech bursts. Of sniper fire. Of shotguns. The cries of the injured, soon to be dead, would drown out the sounds of everything else for a moment. The ground ran red and blue, orange and green with blood, the various colours mixing together, almost a kaleidoscope of blood on the floor.

Soon the fire started to peter out. He called out to cease-fire. Carefully his team moved out of cover. He checked over his team for injuries. One or two of his men were wounded, but no-one had been killed, just a dose of medi-gel and they would be good to go once again. There was the occasional pat on the back as he made his way through his team, nods of appreciation given in return. It was another successful operation, the bodies of the opposition littering the ground. The occasional shot rang out as a survivor was put down. There would be no prisoners. There were never any prisoners. There was sometimes a quick interrogation for information before another gunshot.

"Mierin, prepare the package," Garrus ordered.

With the package prepared in moments, he ordered his squad to move out. Again in the shadows they departed, the sounds of a massive explosion ringing in their ears, as they made their way back to their base, where they would unwind and quietly celebrate another success. It was another battle of a war that he knew would never end. But it was a fight that Garrus would continue until his dying breath.

That was his solemn promise to the people of Omega. But, more importantly, a promise to his lost friend.

* * *

><p><em>AN - If you read the Shadow Broker file on Garrus, all the names I've mentioned above are those listed on his file._

_So, that's the Normandy team now covered. Isn't it? I mean, I'm sure I'm missing someone... I just can't remember who... I'm thinking and thinking but... Nope. Mind blank. Who else was on the Normandy that I could devote a chapter to? Chakwas? Joker? The fellow down in the hangar bay who sold you weapons? Perhaps the ghost of Ashley?_

_Hmm, maybe I'll just have to dive into the main story next chapter..._


	9. Connections 9 - Home and Broken Hearted

_A/N - Ah, I remember who I had missed. :-)_

* * *

><p>"This is Tali'Zorah nar Rayya, requesting an approach vector and docking bay."<p>

"We have you on scans, Tali'Zorah. Please approach the Rayya, docking bay C9. A decontamination team will be available on arrival. And welcome home, Tali'Zorah."

She reached up and switched off the communications link, settling back into the chair as she steered her tiny ship through the gaggle of vessels that made up the Migrant Fleet. Normally, returning to the Fleet, with a Pilgrimage gift as great as she knew she had, would normally be cause for great celebration, and she should have been delighted to finally return to the fleet. Her home.

But Tali had felt nothing but an emptiness in her heart, of great loneliness and immense sadness in the past months. The man she loved, but had never had the courage to tell, was gone. Her heart was utterly broken. She regretted every single day of not having the courage to tell him how she felt. All she remembered were his final words as she sat in the life-pod, utterly helpless as Shepard drifted through space, watching his heartbeat on the monitor and the dreadful sound of his heart stopping. It still gave her nightmares even now, causing her to wake up in the middle of the night, tears streaming down her face, regret etched into her heart.

The worst moment of her life so far, as far as she was concerned, was his funeral. Shepard's body had never been found, assumed to have burned up in the atmosphere of Alchera. The Alliance had sent a small search party in an attempt to find him, but the search ended relatively quickly. She remembered tentatively approaching the closed coffin, knowing that his body was not inside. She barely remembered collapsing onto the coffin lid, tears flowing down her face as shrieks of pain, anger, loss and regret escaped her, or of being led away by Anderson, who tried his best to console her overbearing sense of loss and heartbreak. She still felt the guilt, knowing the Councillor suffered from the loss as much as she did.

His entire team had shared in the same sense of loss, and once the funeral was completed, it was compounded by the news that the team would finally be split up. She understood why, and with the mission now effectively complete, it was time for her to finish her Pilgrimage and return to the fleet. She had to, somehow, pick up the pieces of her life. And move on.

At least she had a small grin on her face as the _Rayya_ came into view. It had been her child-hood home, and a place of some of her fondest memories. She slowed the shuttle as she approached the docking bay, a walkway extending out of the _Rayya_ and attaching itself to her ship. Reaching up, she flicked off the engines and sighed ever so slightly. She was home. Not in the way she would ever have wanted, but she was home.

The rest of her life now lay ahead.

The next day, after spending hours in the decontamination unit, before being awarded a new suit, and then having a medical examination, thankfully nothing too intrusive, Tali was standing in front of the Admiralty Board. It was unusual that a returnee from Pilgrimage would face the Board itself, but a special meeting had been convened at the request of her father. She had handed over the geth data, given to her by Shepard without hesitation during their search for Saren. They were left highly impressed with the gift.

"This data will certainly help us gain further understanding of the geth, and how they have evolved in the many years since our exodus," said Admiral Xen, who had what one would call an obsession with the geth, "I also understand you have encountered many new units during your Pilgrimage?"

"Yes. The geth are no longer the simple machines we once built. There is clear evidence that they are learning, and quickly. I have researched some of the data and it is clear our understanding of the geth may not be what it once was."

"And what of this human captain, this Commander Shepard, with whom you served?" asked her father.

"He was lost...," she replied quietly, head bowed, doing everything she could to not break down in tears again. Now was not the time or place.

"Oh…," came the reply, Tali looking up to see the five Admirals share glances. She knew they could read her body language. She knew her immense sadness vibrated off her. Her feelings, even when stood where she was now, could not be helped.

"Tali, to whom do you wish to present this Pilgrimage gift, and subsequently serve? Take time to think about this. It will be a life-changing decision, and one that should not be taken lightly."

"I need no time to think, Admirals. I have thought about this long and hard since I first left on Pilgrimage, all those months ago. I wish to serve on only one ship. I wish to present this gift to the Captain of the Neema."

The five Admirals shared another glance between each other before turning their attention back to Tali. "Very well, Tali'Zorah vas Neema nar Rayya. Your transfer to the Neema will be authorised once the Captain accepts this gift. I am sure there will be no issues. Congratulations and good luck for the future. We will be watching your progress with interest."

"Thank you, Admirals," she replied, bowing slightly. She had raised her eyebrows at the use of her requested ship in her name, but simply shrugged it off, thinking it was simply a formality in any event.

The meeting was adjourned and the five Admirals departed. She wasn't shocked to see her father say little. She certainly couldn't approach him and share her feelings. He would merely chastise her for being foolish, particularly in regards to her feelings for a human, and tell her to get on with her own life.

So the days, weeks and months passed by quickly for Tali, yet the heartache always remained, though it dulled over time. She found the best medicine was to work. She was a constant presence in engineering, finding herself promoted quickly up the ranks. She constantly volunteered for missions, particularly those in and around geth space, where she could take out her anger and grief on the geth, those she still blamed for his death. She did anything to keep herself busy, as it was those quiet moments, alone in her quarters, alone with her thoughts, that she feared most.

It was during one of those quiet moments, where she was sat on her bed in her quarters, staring at the picture of the _Normandy_, one of the few mementos she kept of her time with Shepard, when she was joined by a visitor. She looked up to see Admiral Raan, who she affectionately called 'Auntie', standing in the doorway. Tali put down the picture on her bedside table and looked up at Raan, who walked across the room and sat next to her on the bed.

"Auntie Raan, what are you doing here?" she asked, unable to keep the surprise out of her tone. She was not expecting any visitors, and certainly not an Admiral, no matter how close the two may be.

"Tali, you have been back with the fleet for months now and still you carry with you an overwhelming sadness. What is it that affects you so much, child?" She just shrugged her shoulders. Could she really explain everything that she felt? "You loved him, didn't you?"

She turned her heard to look at Raan, eyes wide behind her mask. She shouldn't have been so surprised, though. She had barely spoken of Shepard since she had returned. Anytime his name was mentioned in conversation, she made excuses to leave. It hurt to talk about him. Think about him. Remember him…

She nodded her head. The tears soon flowed and sobs started once again. The heartache had never really left. Raan threw an arm around her shoulders and brought her close, trying to console the clearly heartbroken young woman.

"Child, you must move on with your life. I understand how hard it is for you to put this in the past, but it has been over a year now. This continuous mourning will not bring him back."

"But I never told him how I felt…," she explained.

Raan leaned back ever so slightly. "Oh… I thought you were in a relationship? I mean, they are rare between quarians and humans, but not unheard of. I have heard of examples of young quarian females being swept off their feet by a human. I guess being new on the scene gives them an exotic flavour, so to speak."

She laughed lightly but shook her head. "We were close friends. Nothing more. But I loved him. And I never got the chance to tell him how I feel. Now I have to live the rest of my life not knowing if he ever loved me in return."

"Do you truly think he did?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know… In a way, I think he did. There was one night, before we arrived on Ilos, where I think he told me, in his own way, how he felt. But after that… there was the mission, then he had weeks of debrief, and there just wasn't any time to be together alone. But we were always talking otherwise. He always looked out for me whether we were on mission, or simply 'hanging out' on the ship. He was fascinated by our society and culture. We were very close. He told me I was only one of his two closest friends. He told me I was special to him. But could he really love me as I am, behind this suit and mask?"

"Well, what sort of man was he?"

She paused for a moment. What could she say? She could wax lyrical about Shepard for hours. All the good things he had achieved for both humanity and the galaxy. But that wasn't what Raan wanted to hear.

"He was just a good man, Auntie. He was… special. And he was the first person I ever met on Pilgrimage who treated me as an equal. As someone worthy of respect. He put his trust in me. Not just on the battlefield, but as a friend. He shared things with me that he didn't share with anyone else. Even his oldest friends. He cared for me, perhaps more than a Commanding Officer should. But that's just who he was."

"Then hold on to those memories, child. Cherish the memories you shared with Shepard and hold them in your heart and mind. But… it's time to let him go, Tali."

"I can't…," she replied. She knew it sounded like a whine. But the heartbreak had always been there. Dulled, but always there.

"Why not, Tali?"

"Because I wake up every single day with only one emotion, Auntie. Regret. I'll live with that feeling for the rest of my life, knowing that the man I loved burned up in the atmosphere over a nothing planet, for no reason. The Council sent us on a wild goose chase for no reason other than to shut him up about the Reapers. Even now, months later, they disregard everything that Shepard told them. I read the news on the extranet. It's… appalling what they say about him. Only Anderson takes the threat seriously. But even he is only one man. And he's not Shepard."

Raan sat silent for a moment and tried a different tack. She looked at the photo of the _Normandy_ that sat on the small table next to Tali's bed. "Do you have any pictures of the Commander?"

She nodded, grabbing the frame from the table and handing it to Raan. "There's a small button on the side. It will start a slideshow. Just press it to bring up a new picture." Raan clicked the button, the picture of the _Normandy_ disappearing to be replaced by a large, glowing ball. "That was the engine bay of the Normandy. The Tantalus core, it was called."

"Impressive. I had no idea humanity was so advanced."

"The Normandy was an experimental frigate. It had a unique stealth drive. The turians helped build it. But humanity are certainly ambitious. With all the colony worlds they have around the galaxy. They have… drive. They want to get things done. Yesterday."

"The turians helped build it?" Raan asked, slightly incredulous at the thought.

She just nodded. Raan clicked the button. She was surprised to see it was a group shot. She noticed Tali straight away, but was surprised to see, of all things, a krogan in the photo, alongside a few of humans, a turian and an asari.

"A krogan?"

"Yes, that's Wrex. I think he's probably back on Tuchanka now. He was the first friendly krogan I'd ever met. I think we bonded over time. He always called me either 'the little quarian' or 'my little friend'. If it wasn't Shepard looking out for me, then Wrex would do it for him. He was... nice."

"And this was the entire team?"

"Yes, this was taken before what happened on Virmire, so you can see Ashley. She's the human female. I'm standing next to Shepard in the middle."

Raan noticed how close the two were standing together in the photo. She looked up at Tali who simply sat with her head down, hands in her lap. Raan clicked the button for the next photo. She had to turn the frame the other way. It was a photo of Shepard and Tali standing together, Tali looking at the camera while Shepard looked sideways at Tali, with a grin on his face. Raan studied the photo closely. Tali's body language was easy enough to read for Raan, but she studied Shepard. Read the look on his face. How he positioned his body. Clearly towards Tali. She had to stifle a gasp.

_Tali, how could you not recognise…?_

Raan clicked through the photos Tali had kept. Most were of Shepard and Tali. Some were simply of Shepard. There were one or two of the rest of the team, but the theme was clear. Raan's heart broke further with every photo she looked at of the two together. It was so obvious to her. How did Tali miss the signs?

_Child, he clearly loved you just as much in return. How did you not recognise that?_

"Tali, how much do you know about reading body language?"

"Enough. That's how we usually communicate, if not verbally. Why?"

"What about human body language?"

She shrugged. "I know a little bit. I spent long enough with them on the Normandy to understand them quite well, I think."

Raan sighed slightly. _Not well enough, it seems._

"What about Shepard? Could you read him?"

"I like to think I knew him well. We talked all the time. I think I could read his emotions well enough. Particularly his eyes. I could usually read those quite well."

_How did you miss this then? It's obvious, Tali, and I never even met him! But I can't say anything. Telling her now… She'd never recover._

"Are you getting at something, Auntie?"

Raan shook her head. "No, Tali. I can just see from these photos that Shepard obviously cared for you a great deal."

She grinned slightly behind her mask. "I know he did, Auntie. It's one of the many reasons why I loved him."

Raan placed the frame down on the bed beside her and turned back towards Tali. She let out a sigh before speaking.

"Tali, I know this isn't what you want to hear, but it's time for you to move on with your life. You cannot continue to wallow in this sadness that you feel. It isn't helpful, it isn't healthy and it will eventually prove to be a detriment to your progression in the fleet."

She looked at Raan with surprise. "What do you mean, Auntie?"

"Your father has high hopes for you, Tali. All the Admiralty Board does, in all honesty. But he is concerned by your behaviour."

She couldn't help but scoff at the mere suggestion. "I'm surprised he even notices me or my behaviour," she said bitterly.

"Your father is more perceptive than you give him credit for, Tali. He truly does care for you. He just has a funny way of showing it. He loves you and only wants the best for his daughter."

"He does have a funny way of showing it," she muttered.

"You remind him too much of the wife he lost, Tali."

That gave her pause for thought. "I remind him of... mother?"

Raan nodded. "He wouldn't like me sharing this, but I talk to your father every day, Tali. I remember your father prior to losing your mother, and the man he was afterwards. The fire he carried when she was alive was extinguished when she was lost. You are the only reminder he has left of their time together. I see the correlation between what he is like and how you are now."

"I guess that seems possible."

"And what would Shepard say? Would he want you wallowing in misery? Or would he want you to move on with your life and achieve everything that he knew you are capable of?"

She was silent. Shepard wouldn't want her to be sad. He wouldn't want her to be continuously mourning his loss. Shepard thought she was a genius and had told her as much. He had shown her nothing but support during their entire time together. But she could imagine him standing in front of her now, telling her to sort herself out, pull her socks up and get back to work.

Tough love, he would have called it. And she knew it would have worked immediately. She turned to look at Raan, a slight grin behind her mask. "Thank you, Auntie."

Raan nodded her head slightly. "Anytime, Tali. I'm always here if you want to talk. In fact, I'm here right now and I have nowhere I'd rather be. What would you like to talk about?"

Tali didn't even need to think. She talked, laughed and cried about one man for the rest of the night.

The man who would always be her Commander.

The man who she had fallen in love with.

The man she would carry in her heart until her dying day.

Shepard.


	10. Connecting the Dots 10 - True Believers

_A/N - So this is effectively 'Prologue 10'. Covered events I thought were important that would happen between the two games and what the main characters from the first story were up to or how they dealt with events. Think everyone would be happy enough to get stuck into the story proper after this one. Right? Right._

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><p>Operative Miranda Lawson. Head of the Lazarus Project. Loyal Cerberus Officer. To some, the unofficial 'pet' of the Illusive Man. Miranda certainly didn't care what anyone thought of her as she typed away at her terminal, another report to be sent to the Illusive Man regarding the current progress of the project she was in charge of. She looked up from her screen for a moment in thought, taking in the relative spartan furnishings of her large office on Minuteman Station, site of the Lazarus Project. The project had one simple but ambitious aim. One of the greatest scientific endeavours in human history.<p>

Bring Commander Shepard back to life.

Many would have scoffed at the very idea of bringing a dead man back to life. But Miranda Lawson was an incredibly self-confident woman, and had every confidence that she would fulfil the Illusive Man's wishes. It had been nearly two years since the retrieval of the Commander's body. She remembered meeting one of his former colleagues, Liara T'Soni, who had handed his body over after retrieving it from forces working on behalf of the Shadow Broker. Miranda had been surprised that one of his colleagues would be so ready to trust Cerberus, but it appeared Liara was a true believer in the Reaper threat, much like the Illusive Man, so was ready to co-operate if it meant the return of the Commander. She was left wondering if there was more to it, but wasn't interested, so simply took the body and left.

Progress had, of course, been incredibly slow. But considering what the project started with, it was a miracle that Shepard was practically ready to be woken up, likely within the next two or three months, depending on progress. When his body, what was left of it, was brought to the station, the only parts of his body still completely intact were his brain and his heart. The rest of him had either disappeared in part or completely. Over the months, they had to rebuild the Commander's body from scratch. Cybernetic implants helped the reconstruction of the Commander's bones, muscles and nerves while hundreds of skin grafts helped reconstruct the Commander's skin. The science team had recently started pumping the Commander's body with fluids – mostly water and blood – and reports were that the Commander's heart was now operational and he was now only, technically at least, in a coma.

She was still upset about one thing. She was aware of the Commander's hatred for Cerberus, which made her wonder why the Illusive Man was so intent on returning the Commander to life at all. She doubted he would ever willingly work with Cerberus, even if they had the same goal of defeating the Reapers. She wasn't entirely privy to all the information about his missions undertaken while he had been chasing down Saren, but she knew the Commander was responsible for impacting numerous Cerberus operations throughout the galaxy.

Which is why she had approached the Illusive Man requesting a control chip be inserted into his brain. The Illusive Man had immediately vetoed the idea. He wanted the Commander returned exactly as he was. For one of the first times she could remember, she vehemently disagreed with her boss, who let her have her say, before he simply reminded her of who he was, who she was and that what he said goes. She gritted her teeth before agreeing to his wishes. After all, he was the one pumping untold billions into the project. Some of the sums were simply staggering.

_All for one man. He'd better be bloody worth it._

If not a control chip, she had also wanted to put a biotic implant into Shepard. She knew he was 'just' a soldier, but thought giving him biotic abilities may help him improve in all areas. Or so she thought, being a talented biotic herself. The Illusive Man had vetoed that idea as well. Exactly the same, he said. Still, she knew that the Commander had been 'improved'. He would be stronger. Faster. Quicker reflexes. Better vision. He would heal quicker from wounds and be far less susceptible to disease. He would live far longer. Still, she just hoped it didn't all backfire on them and he'd use all his improvement to eventually fight Cerberus again.

Just as she was finishing up her report, her personal communicator sparked into life.

"_Miranda! It's Wilson. Are you there?_"

"I'm here, Wilson. What is it?"

"_It's Shepard. He's… He's waking up!_"

"What? How is that possible?" she replied, standing up out of her comfy leather chair and running out of her office, springing down the corridor to the laboratory where the comatose Commander should be lying. She ran in and came to a stop as she noticed Wilson working hurriedly at his workstation before looking across to see Shepard.

His eyes were open and he was pulling hard at his restraints. She could hear him breathing rapidly. He was clearly anxious about his current predicament.

She looked back at Wilson as he reported what was happening. "He's reacting to outside stimuli. Showing an awareness of his surroundings. He's waking up, Miranda!"

She looked over at the Commander. "He's not ready yet, Wilson. Give him the sedative."

She walked over to the Commander, who turned his head to look at her. She could read a million emotions in his eyes. Surprisingly, there was no fear. Mostly he appeared confused. She was not surprised. The last time he would have closed them, he was floating away in space ready to die.

"Shepard, don't try to move," she said softly, "Try to stay calm."

Shepard raised a hand and grabbed her by the arm as he tried to lift himself off the bed. "Where… am… I?" he managed to croak out.

"You're safe, Shepard. Trust me, you're safe," Miranda replied, lightly pushing Shepard back down onto the bed. That seemed to satisfy the Commander for the time being, who dropped his hand back to the bed.

"Heart rate is still climbing. Brain activity is off the charts."

"Well do something, Wilson!"

"Nothing's working, Miranda!"

She walked around Shepard towards the console where all the Commander's stats were currently showing. She read them quickly before making up her mind.

"Another dose, Wilson. Now!"

"It could kill him!"

She looked back at Shepard, who was watching her intently. "He's strong enough. Do it now!"

She walked back towards Shepard as Wilson reported that the second injection was working, his heart rate was dropping and his stats were stabilising. Just before the Commander closed his eyes, Miranda heard him mention one word.

"Tali…," he said, no more than a whisper.

Miranda was slightly surprised at the mention of the name. She knew the names of his entire team and was aware of how close the whole team had become during their chase for Shepard. But why had he mentioned the name of the quarian who was on his team? As far as all the reports she had read over, Tali'Zorah nar Rayya was a young quarian on her Pilgrimage who simply became involved of the whirlwind of events regarding Saren.

_That doesn't make any sense?!_

"That was too close, Miranda. We almost lost him," reported Wilson.

"I told you your estimates were off. Run the numbers again," she demanded, before she looked back down at Shepard again as he once again appeared at peace. She walked across the lab to stand next to Wilson.

"What the hell started that off?"

"I have no idea, Miranda. I was busy checking over his blood-work when I turned around and noticed his eyes were open. Almost dropped the blood samples in surprise."

"He's not quite ready to be woken up entirely, Wilson. His cybernetics still need time to completely adapt to his body."

"I'm aware of that, Miranda, but we've had to give him a double dose just to get him sedated. I'm not sure how much longer we can keep him under. He's incredibly resilient."

"That he is. Which is why the Illusive Man has spent all this money."

"Are you still sure we've done the right thing, Miranda? Billions spent on just one man. Think of what that money could have been used for instead."

Miranda though for a moment. "Don't ask questions above your station, Wilson. Just do your damned job and make sure he doesn't wake again before I say he's ready."

Wilson glared back at her for a moment. "Yes, Miranda."

"Good. I'll go finish up my report."

She turned and walked out of the lab, almost bumping into Operative Taylor on her way out, who simply turned to one side as she brushed past. Just for fun, she put slightly more emphasis in the way she wiggled her hips as she walked away, resisting the urge to turn around and look as she knew he'd be watching her. Once sat down back in her leather chair, she started typing again, thinking it may be wise to leave the events that just happened out of the report. But she couldn't help but grin slightly to herself as she typed away.

The Commander was back.

* * *

><p><em>AN - Just a quick note that this will be the end of double updates every week._


	11. Chapter 1 - Rude Awakening

_A/N – Just the usual note before we delve into things. That's the prologues done. Hopefully I've done a decent job linking events that didn't actually happen in the game. As we're into the story proper, the usual proviso as I've said before, just trying to put my own spin on events that happened. Some chapters cover on screen events. Some will cover off screen events._

_Being slightly ambitious in that there will be more POVs than just Shepard and Tali. The story will still revolve around them, but there will be focus on most other characters at one time or another. From what I've written so far, particularly Garrus and Miranda. Trying to get into the heads of all these characters, though. Sheesh!_

_Also, for those of you who read 'Search for Saren', rest-assured I won't be putting you through the wringer again so much this time around. I guess you must have found it enjoyable, in some way, if you followed or clicked on that favourite option, but I'm hoping you'll find this story far more light-hearted than my last offering. Quite frankly I don't think I could write something similar again so soon either. Exhausting! There should be far less angst, anyway, though there will always be some drama here and there._

* * *

><p>The bright light caused him to blink rapidly as he slowly opened his eyes. He put a hand over his chest and could feel his heart beating. He could feel the cold air in his throat as he took a deep breath. He moved his hand from his chest, holding it in front of his face, moving it slowly from side to side, following it with his eyes. He lowered his hand and looked back at the ceiling, seeing nothing but white tiles and lights. He turned his head, looking to his left and and then to his right, noticing a number of machines that occasionally beeped while displaying information he didn't understand or simply couldn't read from where he was lying.<p>

_I'm alive? Am I in a hospital?_

It took a few moments for him to finally understand the sound in the background. Alarms were crying out. He didn't move, though. He lay there, deep in thought. The last thing he remembered was floating away in space, having just watched his ship explode after being attacked by another ship. The last thought running through his mind was that he never told the woman he loved how he felt. The last feeling of regret as he felt the air run out and he slowly asphyxiated before everything turned black.

_Where the hell am I? Where is my team? Where's Tali?_

The alarms continued to ring in the background as he now started to wonder where he was and what was going on. He assumed it was a hospital, but he appeared to be alone in the room.

"_Wake up, Commander!"_ called a feminine voice. He opened his eyes wide, searching for where the sound came from, looking left and right but the room was still empty. The sounds of alarms still echoed from outside the room. Then he heard a large explosion.

_Well that can't be good!_

"_Shepard, do you hear me? Get out of that bed now. This facility is under attack!"_

"Alright, alright," he croaked, moving his hand to his throat and rubbing it. His throat felt raw. He moved his hand to his face, feeling a long scar along his cheek, running a finger along it. He was surprised it didn't hurt.

"_Shepard. Your scars aren't healed but I need to get you moving."_

He groaned as he lifted himself up from his bed, swinging his legs over the side of his bed. It was then that he realised he was completely naked, the small blanket that was keeping his modesty intact falling to the floor. He looked out the window to see another explosion and what appeared to be gunfire. Whatever was going on out there, it definitely wasn't good.

He took a quick look around the room. It was still empty but he located a speaker just above his bed. Figuring whoever was talking to him may hear, he called out. "You know, I'm naked and unarmed here! If you want me to survive, I'm going to need a little help."

"_Your armour is in a locker nearby. You should find a pistol in there as well_."

"Pistol? Forget that. What about an assault rifle?"

"_Not yet, Shepard. Now hurry!"_

"Alright, alright, give me a minute," he muttered as he hauled himself to his feet and shuffled over to the locker. He opened the door to see a set of clothes in his size, grabbing a set of underwear and a plain white t-shirt. He then grabbed the armour, taking a second to look over it. Painted jet black with a gloss finish, the light of the room reflecting off it, with a thick red stripe running down the right arm, two thin white stripes on either side of the red stripe. High on the right hand side of his chest-plate was the N7 symbol. He couldn't help but grin slightly as he slowly assembled himself within the armour. He surprised himself by dressing quite quickly considering the commotion outside. Finally, he reached in and grabbed the pistol.

_Shit, no heat sink or thermal clip. Hang on, this appears to be a different design. What the hell is this?_

"There's no thermal clip!" he yelled out, feeling slightly silly as there was no-one in the room.

"_You'll have to find one, Shepard. It's a med bay."_

"Well what the hell do you expect me to do, throw the pistol at whatever I'm supposed to be facing?"

There was no answer to his sarcasm as he stumbled forward, his muscles screaming out in pain. He attempted to figure out just how long he may have been out for, but then he stopped as it simply didn't bear thinking about at the moment. He was quite glad he hadn't had a chance to look in a mirror as he felt at his face again, running his finger along at least three or four scars, still surprised that they didn't hurt. At least he had his armour for the time being but he didn't like the feeling of being unarmed as more explosions continued to echo outside.

He then leapt back behind the bed he had been lying in as the door leading out exploded in a fireball in front of him. He chanced a peek over the top and didn't see anyone coming through. Surprised, he kept his pistol in hand as he slowly walked forward.

"_Someone's hacking security trying to kill you. Try looking for a thermal clip."_

"Just a normal day in the life of Commander Shepard, it seems," he muttered to himself as he exited the lab. He noticed a thermal clip lying on the floor. It was of a small cylindrical shape but of a design he had never seen before. It appeared things had changed, at least in regards to weapon design, since he was spaced.

_Just how long have I been out? Guess I'd better make sure to collect some of these while I'm moving._

The doors in front eventually opened, noticing a makeshift barricade had been erected, though whoever had built it had since disappeared. He leapt over the barricade and couldn't help but notice the bodies scattered over the floor. Some were in lab coats, others were in some sort of uniform though it was too dark to make out the symbol. Ahead was a flight of steps, on the first landing was a mech. Which opened fire. At him.

"The fuck?" he muttered as he ran towards cover, taking a knee behind a crate. He waited until the mech stopped firing before he leaned out of cover and put a bullet right through the head of the machine, which dropped to the ground and exploded. He looked down at his hand and the pistol.

_How the fuck did I do that?_

"_Keep moving, Shepard. You need to get to the shuttles."_

_Shuttles? Just where the hell am I then? Is there anyone else alive here? Is the voice guiding me even here?_

He shook his head slightly. Time to stop thinking and start doing. He ran up the stairs, two at a time and through another set of doors, into another sort of laboratory. Large writing on a wall to his right indicated this was some form of observation room. Otherwise, the room was empty, the only sound the alarms continuing to echo throughout the facility. The set of doors ahead, another mech walking through, firing away. He simply raised his pistol and fired again. The first shot only hit its chest, then firing again, this one smacking through its head. The mech blew up.

"_More mechs on the way. Take cover!"_

"Yeah, thanks lady, whoever you are," he muttered to himself as he moved to his right up a small set of stairs, taking cover behind a row of glass barriers as four mechs walked into the room from another door. He stayed down in cover as the four mechs opened fire on his position, waiting for just a second to return fire. Soon the mechs stopped as they continued their advance, Shepard standing and firing – pop, pop, pop, pop – and the four mechs all feel to the ground. The heat sink immediately popped out once he'd stopped firing, replacing it with a fresh one.

_Guess I'm going to have to get used to doing that._

"Fuck me, I've never been this good with a pistol," he whispered to himself as he stood up out of cover and walked on, pistol in his right hand, searching for targets. The doors to the left led nowhere so he walked through the doors ahead. Through the windows he could see a fire rage out of control while bodies littered the hallway, bloodstains pooling on the ground while there were streaks along the walls where people had been shot. He also noticed the symbol he'd seen on the uniforms and various walls and doors around the facility. He'd never seen it before but still wracked his mind trying to remember what it represented. Another set of doors led to a landing. He noticed another body and a grenade launcher next to it.

"_Grab the grenade launcher, Shepard."_

"Can you see me?"

"_I'm following your progress on security cameras. More mechs are on the way, Shepard. Grab the launcher and get ready!"_

He took cover, keeping an eye on the set of doors below. They opened seconds later, four more mechs walking through, and opening fire, though he was safe and comfortable where he was. He waited until their fire whittled down before he stood up and returned fire. The grenade looped and landed in between the four of them, exploding into a fireball, leaving the mechs as nothing more than small parts on the floor.

"Yeah! Take that fuckers!" he yelled, pumping his fist in salute of the destruction.

"_Just take the elevator down one floor, Shepard._"

He took the elevator down to the next level, running and sliding underneath flames that erupted from a pipe damaged after the grenade explosion. Further into the facility, or closer to the exit, he walked on, as more explosions continued to echo. He opened a set of doors in front of him, revealing an office. On the floor appeared a damaged mech, crawling towards him. He just aimed down and fired. He stored his pistol for a moment as he took a look around the office, approaching a terminal.

"_Progress is slow, but subject shows sign of recovery. Major organs are again functional, and there are signs of rudimentary neurological activity."_

"Wonder if she's talking about me?" he muttered to himself as he walked across the room to another terminal.

"_Log update: The cost of this project is astronomical – over four billion credits so far. But nobody seems to care that we've gone over budget. I don't know where the boss gets all his money… maybe it's better not to know. I just wish he'd kick a little more in my direction once in a while."_

He couldn't help but whistle. "Four billion credits? Who or what would they spend that sort of money on?" he asked himself quietly as he continued to look around the room. But there was little else he found of interest, and anything scientific was far beyond his limited understanding. He walked out and up another set of stairs. To his right he heard someone shout his name, turning just in time to see a human being blown apart by a large mech. He grimaced slightly as blood was splattered against the glass, the body falling to the floor out of sight.

_Well that was nasty…_

The mech opened fire at him, the glass in front proving to be bullet-proof. The mech stopped firing after a few seconds as it appeared to realise the futility of continuing its fire. Ignoring the mech, he approached another terminal sitting next to the window. Interested in what other information he may obtain, he switched it on.

"_I can't figure Miranda out. As project director, she should be ecstatic at all the progress we've made. But she's still the same old ice queen."_

"Wonder if it was Miranda who was watching me?" he asked himself as he turned and walked on, noticing the massive mech through the glass window to his left still standing and waiting alone, watching his progress. He just stopped and waved at it, smirking slightly, before he turned and walked through the next set of doors. Aside from the fires that raged all around, bathing the room in an eerie orange glow, he noticed a human male, dark in complexion, and also coated in a biotic aura, busy firing at a group of mechs across a large gap. The other male turned slightly and gasped.

"Commander? You're awake?" he asked, clear surprise in his tone. He didn't respond, instead just lifting his pistol and firing at the mechs across the other side of the gap. It only took a few shots, Shepard almost enjoying himself as each bullet hit its intended target. Optics taken out, maybe an arm shot off. Once the mechs were finished off, the other male ducked down into cover, Shepard walking forward and joining him. The other male was wearing the same uniform as worn by all the bodies he'd noticed on his way. He looked Shepard over.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were still a work in progress."

He ignored his question, asking his own. "Who are you? Do you work with this Miranda I've heard about?"

"Yeah… sorry. Forgot this was all new to you right now. I'm Jacob Taylor. I've been stationed here for…"

Jacob stopped talking as he stood up and fired at another group of mechs, Shepard joining him, firing into the group before they both took cover again.

"Damn, things must be worse than I thought if Miranda's got you running around. I'll fill you in but we'd better get you to the shuttles first."

"What the hell is going on? Why are these mechs attacking us? What am I doing here?"

The pair stood up again and fired before once again taking cover.

"Fair enough. Quick version. You and your ship were attacked and destroyed. You were killed. Dead as dead can be when they brought you here. Our scientists spent the last two years putting you back together. You've been comatose, or worse, that whole time. Welcome back to your life, Commander."

_Two years? Dead? Fuck me! How is any of that even possible?_

_And just where the hell am I?_

"Okay, another question. Just where exactly is 'here'? I don't recognise the symbol I've seen everywhere, but I know this isn't an Alliance facility."

"It's isn't. I can't say much more than that for now. All I know is that the Alliance declared you KIA. The whole galaxy thinks you're dead. And we need to get to those shuttles ASAP."

"I have more questions."

"If you help me finish of these mechs, we can play twenty questions all day."

"Easy enough. Give me your pistol."

"What?"

"You want me to trust you, trust me in return."

Jacob looked at him for a moment before he shrugged and handed over his pistol. He took a deep breath as he looked over the railing to see four mechs on the other side. Shepard steeled himself, took a deep breath and stood up. He blasted away with his pair of pistols, the four mechs falling to the ground in quick succession under a hail of bullets from the twin pistols. He had to resist blowing the barrels as he placed one back in its holster, handing the other to Jacob, who looked at Shepard in complete surprise. He held out a hand to Jacob, helping him to his feet.

"I'm impressed. Seeing you in action is certainly different to reading reports." Shepard just shrugged. "Okay, I said I'd answer your questions. What do you want to know?"

"Where's my crew? How many survived?"

"Nearly all of them survived. There were losses. It was inevitable in that sort of surprise attack. Your XO, Pressly, didn't make it. But everyone else, including non-Alliance – the turian, Garrus, the asari, Liara, and the quarian…."

"Tali's alive?"

"Yeah, she made it out alive."

"Where is she?"

"I don't know. You'll have to ask Miranda. She might know. But it's been two years, Commander. They've moved on with their lives. Most would no longer be working with the Alliance."

That hit him right in the gut. _Two years… fuck... She would have moved on by now. Finished her Pilgrimage. Probably on a new ship by now. Perhaps heading up the engineering department. Yeah, definitely being the boss._ Shepard smiled at that thought, at least._ Probably fallen in love with someone by now. Maybe even married by now. I hope she's happy._ The feeling hurt, more than he'd care to admit, but he kept his face blank in front of Jacob as all these thoughts crossed his mind.

"I want to find them. All of them. If they knew I was back, they'd join up with me again. Although… I don't exactly know what I'll be doing." Shepard scratched the back of his head. "Guess I could go back to the Alliance…" he mumbled to himself.

"Not my decision, Commander. And, as I said, they've all moved on. First thing is first, though. We have to get off this station."

He was about to ask another question when Jacob's ear-piece crackled. It appeared there may have been another survivor. Shepard couldn't hear what was being said, though he heard Jacob's response.

"Wilson? This is Jacob. I'm here with Commander Shepard. Just took out a wave of mechs over in D Wing." Jacob appeared to receive a positive enough response as he answered they'd moved out shortly.

"Wilson? I think I remember that name…" Shepard said to himself.

"He's the chief medical tech. Answers directly to Miranda. You ready?"

Shepard figured question time was over for now. "Sure. Let's move."

Shepard took point in what appeared to be a completely natural move, as if he hadn't been dead for two years. The thought still clouded his mind as the doors in front of him opened, another long corridor leading off to his left, a series of doors on either side that remained closed. He stayed alert as he walked forwards, feeling the presence of Jacob just behind him to his left. The door ahead opened in front of him, with only a low red glow lighting the way ahead through the service tunnels. A pair of mechs opened fire, the pair of humans putting them down with ease.

"Damn it, Wilson. This room is crawling with mechs!" Jacob complained over his radio. Shepard didn't hear the response but Jacob snorted in disapproval once he'd closed the line.

"What's with these new weapons, Jacob?"

"New technology, Commander. You'll soon realise a hell of a lot has changed in the last two years."

"Why the change with the heat sinks though?"

"I'm sure you remember overheating was always a problem, Commander."

"Yeah, don't remind me. It was a pain in the ass."

"The turians designed a universal heat sink that could be used in any weapon. A heat sink that can be used in a pistol can be used in a sniper rifle and vice versa. Once a weapon has expended the energy of the heat sink, it will automatically pop and a new heat sink can be placed within seconds. It's certainly a more efficient design and overheating is no longer a problem."

"If you say so. It'll just take some time getting used to."

The pair cleared out the mechs, Jacob proving to have both biotic and tech abilities, leaving Shepard impressed with his abilities already. _He may prove useful in a new team. Wonder if he'd be interested in joining me?_ He put down the final mech as Jacob once again contacted Wilson, pleading for a new route that would avoid the pair of them running into more mechs. The door ahead led to another hallway and a set of stairs, Jacob urging him on as he reported Wilson may be in trouble. Shepard didn't exactly know who this Wilson was, but Jacob appeared to trust him, and although he wasn't about to put trust in anyone yet, at least it was another survivor.

He bounded up the stairs, turning to his left into a small alcove where a pair of bodies lay bloodied on the ground and a small terminal lay on a table. Figuring there may be even more information, Shepard switched it on.

"_Physical reconstruction of subject is complete, but we still need to evaluate all mental and neurological functions. Our orders were clear: make Commander Shepard who he was before the explosion – the same mind, the same morals, and the same personality."_

"Fuck me. Whoever this is did spend four billion on bringing me back. But why? I'm just one man…," he said quietly to himself, "Why have they gone to all this effort?"

He turned around and walked through the other set of doors, opening to reveal another human male laying back against a crate, groaning in agony. He moved quickly, kneeling beside him as he called the pair of them over.

"Bastards got me in the leg," he said.

"I think I recognise you," Shepard stated.

"Yeah, I was there the first time you regained consciousness. To you it may have just seemed like a dream. Almost lost you that day. Miranda was there as well."

Jacob was busy looking at Wilson's leg, before he stood up and walked across to a first aid station on the other side of the room, before he returned and started applying it to the wound. Within a couple of minutes, Wilson was able to stand, though he still clearly had some residual pain and couldn't put all his weight on his right leg. But it was an improvement.

"Do you know what's going on here, Wilson?"

"I don't know. I thought maybe I could shut down the security mechs. But whoever did this fried the whole system. Completely irreversible."

He looked across at Jacob, who was clearly suspicious. "We didn't ask what you were doing. Why do you even have security mech clearance? You were in the bio wing." Shepard could hear the tone of accusation in Jacob's voice.

"Weren't you listening?" Wilson snapped back, clearly unhappy with Jacob's tone, "I came here to try and fix this. I was just shot! How do you explain that?"

"Quite frankly, gentlemen, I don't know any of you and certainly don't trust any of you yet so forgive me if I interrupt your little argument here," Shepard stated, "I've just received quite a lot of personal information that I still have to digest so all I want to do is get the hell out of here and figure out just what the fuck is going on."

"You're right, Commander. What we need to do is find Miranda. We can't leave her behind."

"Forget about Miranda," Wilson stated, "She was over in D wing. Mechs swarmed that sector. There's no way she survived."

Jacob chuckled slightly. "You don't know Miranda. A bunch of mechs won't get the drop on her. She's alive."

He nodded in agreement. "I believe so. She was guiding me to your position, Jacob."

"Then where is she?"

"There's only two possible explanations. She's either dead. Or a traitor!"

"I don't buy it," Shepard replied, "She woke me up and saved my ass. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt for the time being."

"Whatever. The simple fact is that she's not here, we are. We need to save ourselves."

"We'll talk later. Move out for now," he ordered, taking out his pistol and walking on, the door ahead opening to reveal more mechs encroaching on their position. He took cover behind a crate while Jacob used an overload on a pile of canisters, causing them to explode, taking out most of the mechs, standing out of cover and blasting away the last pair. He was about to move on when Jacob called out for him to stop.

"What is it, Jacob?" he asked, turning around to face him while holstering his pistol.

"You mentioned the word trust before. If I tell you who we work for, will you trust me?"

"Is this really the time, Jacob?" Wilson interjected.

"We won't make it if he's expecting a shot in the back."

He raised an eyebrow at that. _Shot in the back? Just who are these people?_

"It's your ass, Jacob."

He watched Jacob take a deep breath and look him right in the eyes. "The program that rebuilt you was called the Lazarus Project. It's funded and controlled by Cerberus."

_WHAT?!_

Without even thinking, he had his pistol back in his hand, striding forward. Wilson moved to block him, Shepard pistol-whipping back-handed, barely registering him falling to the ground. Jacob hadn't moved, almost in surprise at his outburst as the Commander closed the space between the pair quickly, Shepard grabbing the other male around the throat and forcing him back against the wall.

"What the fuck does Cerberus want with me?" he yelled into his face, placing the barrel of the pistol underneath his chin. "What the fuck have you done to me?"

"The Alliance have declared you a dead man, Commander," Jacob managed to choke out, "They gave up on you."

"And your point is?" he retorted, feeling his fingers squeeze even tighter as he slowly started to lift Jacob off the ground, opening his eyes in realisation at his own strength.

_Fucking hell, how strong am I?_

"Commander, Cerberus have just spent a fortune bringing you back from the dead. There's a very good reason why."

He stopped all his movements as Jacob gave an almost imperceptible nod of the head, despite the presence of the hand around his neck. He knew exactly to what Jacob was referring. He couldn't help but let out a deep sigh at the realisation.

_The Reapers. They brought me back to fight the fucking Reapers._

He lowered Jacob to the ground, removed the barrel of his pistol from his chin and finally released the grip on his throat, Jacob taking a deep breath as he put his hands on his knees. He was still reeling from the information as Jacob straightened up. He was surprised that he didn't look pissed off. Wilson wasn't terribly happy as he muttered to himself on the ground to his right.

"Commander, listen. I'm quite reasonable. I don't know a lot about your history with Cerberus, but I know enough to understand why you'd be suspicious. But, right now, we need to work together to at least get out of here. But I thought you deserved to know what's what."

He looked at Jacob, down to Wilson before he looked back at Jacob. "Fine. I can at least thank you for your honesty, Jacob."

"Once we're off the station, I'll take you to the Illusive Man. He'll explain everything. I promise."

He chuckled. "Illusive Man? What the hell kind of name is that? But I'm guessing he's in charge, right? With a name like that, he's bound to be in charge of an organisation like this."

"Nobody knows who he really is. Shrouded in secrecy," Wilson replied.

"It was a code name used by the Alliance. He actually liked it so kept using it," Jacob added.

He took a moment to clarify his thoughts. Of all the organisations he had to end up with, it just had to be Cerberus. It must be God fucking with him. _Toombs. Kahoku. Chasca. Nodacrux. I remember all those names. I remember what I saw. Once I'm off this station, I'm getting the fuck out of here and returning to the Alliance._

"I'll put this quite plainly, Jacob. You, Miranda, the Illusive Man. Your entire organisation. You don't honestly think I'd lower myself to work with you?" He chuckled again, shaking his head in disbelief. "Fuck, and people thought I was delusional with all the visions I received from the beacons."

Jacob just shrugged. "You can tell that to the boss if you like, Commander. But after we've saved our butts."

"Good enough for me. Let's go."

The hallway ahead was littered with even more bodies. With no way forward, he opened a door to the right, leading to a set of stairs leading down. The trio entered what appeared to be a large loading bay, where they quickly came under fire from more mechs, Wilson and Jacob using a series of overloads while Shepard finished them off with a quick pistol shot. Down and up through the by the trio moved, the waiting shuttle sitting silently in the distance. _We must be getting close. Wonder if this Miranda woman is waiting for us?_ Another flight of stairs, Shepard was going to head to the right towards what appeared to be the way to the shuttle when doors to the left opened and at least half a dozen mechs walked in, already firing.

_Well… shit!_

He leapt into cover behind a crate, returning fire around the side as his two companions took cover of their own, each sending an overload the mechs way. Shepard was busy firing away when he remembered the grenade launcher on his back. Quickly taking it in hand, he stood and fired at the group of mechs. Four of them exploded immediately while a fifth was blown backwards, his two companions standing out of cover and firing to finish it off.

"Nice work, Commander," Jacob stated, Shepard merely grunting in return as he placed the launcher on his back and walked towards the empty room as he noticed another personal terminal sitting on a desk alone.

"_Test subject has been recovered, but the damage is far worse than we initially feared. In addition to the expected burns and internal injuries from the explosion, subject has suffered significant cellular breakdown due to long-term exposure to vacuum and sub-zero temperatures."_

He turned to his two companions. "I assume that's about me then?"

Wilson nodded.

"It was that bad?"

"Let's just say we didn't exactly have a whole lot to work on, Commander," Wilson replied.

"Just how… human am I?"

Wilson shrugged. "Your brain and heart are the same as, despite the extensive damage, those two organs were relatively intact. The rest of you is rebuilt organic tissue but extensive use cybernetics were required during your reconstruction. 'What is human?' is more a philosophical than medical question in my opinion."

Not wanting to get into a debate, and certainly not with someone from Cerberus, he simply brushed past his two companions towards the shuttle bay doors. Wilson hurried past the Commander to hack the door which appeared locked. He was busy working the console when the door suddenly opened. Shepard noticed a tall, rather striking brunette in what appeared to be a white cat-suit waiting for them, with a fantastic set of... She looked at Wilson.

"Miranda! But, you were…"

Wilson didn't get to finish his sentence as Miranda quickly un-holstered a pistol and put a bullet through Wilson's head, who collapsed to the ground, blood pooling on the ground from the wound. Shepard had his gun up and aimed at Miranda in an instant. _Okay, what the fuck is going on?_ He didn't get a word out as Jacob crouched next to Wilson, taking his pulse. It was pointless, as he was dead as soon as he hit the ground.

"Miranda, what the hell are you doing?"

"My job, Jacob. Wilson betrayed us all."

_That accent? She's from my neck of the woods?! _He smirked. _No great surprise regarding betrayal, this is Cerberus after all._ "Did he really deserve to be shot out of hand? Where's your evidence? I guess that's your idea of due process?"

"He sabotaged the security systems, killed my staff and he would have killed us."

"You sure about that Miranda?" asked Jacob, just as suspicious as he was originally with Wilson, "We've known Wilson for years. What if you're wrong?"

"I'm never wrong." He laughed at that, Miranda casting a cold glance his way, before looking back at Jacob. "I thought you would have learned that by now, Jacob."

"Why kill him?" Shepard asked, gun still aimed at her, "You could have kept him alive. Questioned him. Could have had some fun with him."

"Too risky. I've put too much time and effort bringing you back to life to let you get killed now."

"So I've heard. So tell me why I should trust you? I know who you work for."

Miranda looked at Jacob with a slight smirk. "Ah, Jacob. I knew you conscience would get the better of you."

"Lying to the Commander isn't the way to get him to join our cause."

"Join your cause?" he chuckled, "You're fucking kidding, right? The only thing I'm doing is getting off this station and heading back to the Citadel. Arcturus. Earth. Anywhere but fucking Cerberus."

"Not so fast, Shepard. My boss would like to speak to you."

"And what on earth makes you think that I want to speak to him?"

"Considering he's just spent billions rebuilding you, I think you should at least hear what he has to say."

"And what makes you think I care what he has to say?"

Miranda sighed, clearly exasperated at the situation. Shepard didn't care. He wasn't going to be cooperative with Cerberus. "Look, Shepard. This is the only shuttle off this station. You can stay if you want, or you can come with me and meet the boss."

He muttered something to himself inaudible to the other two while thinking along the lines of _I could just shoot these two and steal the shuttle. Hmmm, bad plan. Don't really know how to fly a shuttle. Don't know where the hell I am anyway._ He looked over a Jacob, who seemed fairly relaxed. _Well, he's at least friendly enough. And relatively talented. Wonder what his background is?_ Then he looked back at Miranda._ Yeah, Wilson was right. A definite ice queen. I can feel the cold from here. But… shit, I've got no choice. I either go with these two or stay here and… die again._

"Commander?" Miranda asked, clearly growing impatient.

He could only sigh. "Well, seems I have no real choice in the matter. But, if you don't mind, I'm going to keep my little friend in hand as we go along. We're not exactly in trust mode yet."

"As you wish, Commander," Miranda replied, before she turned around and walked towards the shuttle. He couldn't help but watch her walk away, just for a moment, before looking across at Jacob, who was doing the same thing. Sighing again, he walked towards the shuttle.

_Had enough of this place to last a lifetime anyway._


	12. Chapter 2 - Talking to a Stranger

_A/N – As a treat for my two regular reviewers, and knowing that phil is positively dying to see the next chapter, I'm feeling extremely generous and thought I would upload two chapters this week. I'm sure many of you are looking forward to Freedom's Progress anyway so... Why the hell not?_

_Phil also mentioned in his review about Shepard appearing relatively calm about the revelation of his death, time out etc. As I assured him, dealing with his resurrection will be a theme dealt with over time. Didn't want to deal with it all in just one chapter. Plus, he just wanted out of Dodge!_

* * *

><p>The shuttle was almost uncomfortably quiet though Shepard didn't particularly care, quite content to sit in silence for the entire journey if required. He sat with his right leg crossed above his left, the pistol still in his right hand, finger still on the trigger, though resting lightly on his thigh, pointed directly at Miranda. Otherwise, he didn't move a muscle, only his eyes moving from left to right occasionally. Jacob looked relatively relaxed. Shepard didn't exactly trust him, but in his gut, he had a good feeling about him. <em>But why's he with Cerberus? Must be a long story.<em> Then he flicked his eyes back to Miranda and glared. To her credit, she glared right back at him. _She's certainly got some spirit. Wonder what her story is? Not that I really care..._

He eventually turned his head slightly to look out into the vast emptiness of space. Eventually he found his thoughts wandering slightly, back to his times on the _Normandy._ Mostly he was just left with that one feeling of regret._ I should have told her I loved her. Didn't Anderson say I'd live with regret otherwise?_ He sighed slightly, noticing Jacob and Miranda both looking in his direction.

"Something on your mind, Commander?" Jacob asked.

"No," he replied quite bluntly. _And I certainly don't want to share anything that personal with either of you. Not about… her._

Miranda cleared her throat. "Commander, before you meet with the Illusive Man, we need to ask you a few questions to evaluate your condition."

"Like what?" he replied.

"Come on, Miranda, more tests? Shepard took down most of those mechs without any trouble. In fact, it was probably too easy for him. That has to be good enough."

"Agreed," he stated flatly.

"It's been two years since the attack. The Illusive Man needs to know that Shepard's personality and memories are intact. Ask the questions."

"So despite the fact I've just learned that I've apparently been dead for two years, I'm now alive due to some sort of scientific miracle if I was really dead, though who knows what bullshit you'd spin me. Then add to that everyone I know and trusted is gone and I'm now in the company of two people who are part of an organisation I thoroughly despise and want nothing more than to see the back of, you still want to ask me questions?"

"It's standard procedure, Commander."

"Like I give a fuck what your standard procedures are. I don't work for Cerberus. So thanks for your concern, but go fuck yourself."

His finger tightened on the trigger. _Two __bullets, Shepard. Pop. Pop. But... there has to be another reason why I'm here. Surely?_

"Are you going to continue to be uncooperative, Shepard?" Miranda asked coolly.

Shepard smirked. "I would normally just say bite me but what are you going to do? Shoot me? Don't think that'll impress the Illusive Man, to know he's spent all those billions just for you to put a bullet in me. Though you're more than welcome to try." He just sat back and folded his arms, leaving his gun unattended to his side, though within reach so he could easily put a bullet in both of them, the smirk still on his face.

Miranda looked ready to say something before she took a breath and stayed silent, simply crossing her legs and hooking her hands over her knee. Jacob leaned forward, elbows on his knees, clearing his throat before he spoke. "Commander, you've been dead, officially at least, for two years and 12 days. And, honestly, you were on an operating table for most of it. I can understand it would be a lot to take in. We're not asking for you to like us or like our organisation. All we want to do is make sure you're okay."

He raised an eyebrow. _He seems honest enough, I guess. I always go with my gut. And my gut tells me not to exactly trust this guy but at least give him a chance._ "Still coming to terms with that alone, Jacob. That's going to take a while to sink in."

Miranda sighed again. "The sooner we start, the sooner we can be done. Start with personal history."

"Simple start, Commander. Where were you born? What was your upbringing like?"

"I was born on Earth, Jacob. Probably the same country as her, judging by the accent," he said, gesturing towards Miranda, "As for the rest, I'd rather not discuss it. You probably have my records. I can only assume you know pretty much everything about me, right Miranda?"

Miranda just glared again, causing him to smirk again. _She's a feisty one. Though she does have a fantastic set of... Get your mind out of the gutter, Shepard._

"You were awarded the Star of Terra for saving a human colony. Tell me about it." Jacob asked.

"There's not a lot to tell. I, along with thousands of others, fought off an invasion. The Alliance rewarded me with a medal for doing what anyone else would have done. I lost a lot of friends and watched a lot of people die that day. And, to top all that off, the man who pinned that medal on my chest was murdered by your organisation. Add that to my long list of grievances against you assholes."

Jacob glanced at Miranda, who shrugged. Shepard scoffed before Jacob looked back at him. He thought there was a hint of guilt in his eyes as Jacob continued. "I've read the report about your actions on Elysium, Commander. I won't mention names, but you were the only survivor from your unit and you saved the colony to boot. To many, that makes you a hero."

"So I've been told."

"Let's try another one," Miranda stated, "Virmire, where you destroyed Saren's cloning facility. You had to leave one of your squad behind to die in the blast."

"Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams was killed in action. It was your call. Why did you leave her behind?"

He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. _They're asking about that!_ He opened his eyes, leaning forward, placing his elbows on his knees before he glared at both of them. "I'm going to put this very simply to both of you. Fuck. You. How dare you ask me that question? You have no right to ask about that."

"We're only trying to ascertain…" Miranda started.

He raised a hand to interrupt. "I don't give a flying fuck what you're trying ascertain. You really want to know what I remember? I remember leaving behind one of the bravest soldiers I've ever known to die alone in a nuclear blast. I remember losing a fantastic colleague. I remember losing a good friend. I remember a soldier who was a vital part of my team. And I remember that I had to make that choice. And you have the audacity to ask why? There is no 'why'. There was a choice. I had to make it. I saved as many as I could."

"She died a hero, Commander. And Cerberus agreed with the decision to blow up the cloning facility," Jacob stated.

"While I believe the krogan deserve a future, that facility was not the way for it to happen. So on that, I can agree, Jacob."

"Final question, Shepard. You ordered the Alliance to save the Destiny Ascension and you killed Saren. What happened next?"

He couldn't help but grin at the memory. "Humanity was offered a spot on the Council. I recommended Captain Anderson for the position. How is he, by the way?" _I hope he's doing well. I'd like to see him once I'm done here._

"He's doing well, Commander. Though from what I hear, he preferred life in the military."

"I remember he was having difficulty adapting to his new role. He's a Navy man, through and through. We spoke in the time between defeating Saren and my next mission. I figured he'd get used to it. But there was a reason why I suggested him as the human Councillor."

"Well, that's your memory sorted. That appears solid. I guess there are more tests…"

"Come on, Miranda. Enough with the quizzes."

"I could quite easily state that you can stick any more tests up your ass, as well." Another glare.

Jacob glanced at him before continuing. "The memories are there, and I can vouch for his combat skills. I've seen more than enough. The Commander is back."

Miranda sighed. "Fine. We'll have to hope the Illusive Man accepts our little field test as evidence enough."

The ship descended into silence as he stared out the window, deep in thought, as feelings of regret overcame him once again.

* * *

><p>The massive red but dying star of Anadius provided the only light in the otherwise dark room. A bank of holographic screens provided an almost unlimited supply of information regarding activities around the galaxy. Maybe a coup in one system. An assassination in another. A successful scientific experiment completed. Perhaps the embezzlement of a few million credits in another front company. It was all there, yet he had no eye for these at the moment.<p>

The middle-aged human male sat in his expensive yet rather simple looking chair with his back to the screens, only darkness in front of him. In his right hand was a cigarette. He brought it to his mouth and took a long drag, sucking the smoke deep down into his lungs, savouring the taste, before he blew out, expelling the smoke as it slowly faded away. He loved smoking. He loved it as it pissed off a lot of people, having been outlawed in many places throughout the galaxy. Because he loved smoking, he always smoked the most expensive brand. And the best.

To his left on a small side table was a glass tumbler. Within the tumbler were four large ice cubes. Surrounding the ice cubes was an amber liquid. Bourbon. On the rocks. The best, and as far as he was concerned, the only way to drink bourbon. But it had to be good bourbon. Expensive bourbon. Smooth down the throat, with only a slight burning sensation as it settled in your stomach.

He flicked ash from the cigarette into an ashtray as he took another drag of his cigarette and continued to wait. He was a patient man. He had already been notified of events that happened on Lazarus Station. He was aware that Commander Shepard had managed to escape with the help of two of his operatives. _Miranda has done well. Far better than even I expected. She will go far with us. Jacob has proven to be a worthy addition to the cause. Shame the trust is not there but as long as he does the business, then it's a paycheque at the end of the day. But they did their jobs. _

_Shepard is alive._

Commander Shepard alive was step one. Investing Commander Shepard in his mission was step two. And far more difficult, in his opinion, than step one. He was more than aware of the Commander's one man war against his organisation while he chased Saren two years before. Shepard still didn't know the whole truth about Cerberus. And that suited the Illusive Man just fine. Whether Shepard would ever become a believer in his cause was doubtful. But to have Shepard as an ally? The possibilities were endless if that came to pass.

"Boss, Commander Shepard is attempting communication," called one of his staff. He was simply known as 'Boss'. Being called 'The Illusive Man' would just sound silly. And absolutely no-one knew of his personal history before Cerberus. No-one knew his name, where he was born or even what he did prior to Cerberus. Anyone who did manage to find out would find themselves in a deep, dark hole in a far-away planet, lonely and forgotten. The past was not worth worrying about as far as the Illusive Man was concerned. It was only about the future.

Humanity's future.

He took another drag of his cigarette as assorted lights on the ceiling started to shine, illuminating his features slightly, as the holographic display of Commander Shepard, looking around slightly confused, appeared before him.

"Commander Shepard."

He watched the hologram of Shepard look ahead as his own display would now appear to him. He watched him fold his arms across his chest, a smirk appear across his face. "Ah, so you're the Illusive Man. I thought we'd be meeting face-to-face. Though I'm sure you'd know how that would end. Very quickly." Shepard took out his pistol and looked at it almost reverently. "A bullet from this gun would enter your face and then I would have to resist pissing on your corpse."

The Illusive Man took another drag of his cigarette as he took in his words._ I was expecting hostility but even this is a surprise. I wonder how Miranda and Jacob handled him._

The Illusive Man simply chuckled for a mere moment. "Well consider this a necessary precaution. Not unusual for people who know what you and I know."

"If you're expecting a 'thank you' for me being alive, then you're going to be extremely disappointed. I was quite content being dead. I'd done my job. My duty. All I ever wanted after I died was for my body to be burned up and then stuck in a hole in the ground and quietly forgotten. And if you think I'm ever going to trust you or any of the clowns you have working for you," Shepard chuckled, "You are seriously mistaken."

"You need to put your personal feelings aside, Shepard."

"Fuck you. And that's Commander to you, as well. While we're at it, why don't I list my personal feelings." He watched as the Commander held up a hand and subsequent fingers, counting them off. "Admiral Kahoku. Corporal Toombs. Edolus. Binthu. Nepheron. Chasca. Nodacrux. Should I continue?"

He didn't miss the fact Shepard left his middle finger up at the end. The Illusive Man took another drag of his cigarette. _This is going to be more difficult than even I imagined._ "Commander, humanity is up against the greatest threat of our brief existence."

The smirk disappeared from his face as Shepard raised an eyebrow and nodded. "The Reapers," he stated matter-of-factly. _That got his attention. At least he remembers that._

"Good to see your memory's still intact. How are you feeling?"

"How about we just get down to business as I'm obviously here for a reason. I know you've invested money in me so you think you've earned the right to ask me personal questions. You haven't. Just tell me whatever it is you have to say."

"Cerberus isn't as evil as you believe, Commander. You and I are on the same side; we just have different methods."

"Could have fooled me. Although I did spend nearly a year killing many of your operatives. So I guess I was doing some good at least. Yeah, those are some fond memories. Really enjoyed wiping out some of your operations. You hired some right fucking assholes."

"Commander…"

Shepard sighed. "Fine. What are the Reapers up to that made you decide to bring me back?"

_Finally we can get to business. I wonder if he's going to be this hostile going forward. He'd better not be otherwise I'll have to reconsider._ He stood up out of his chair, taking another drag from his cigarette as he approached the hologram. "We're at war, Commander. No-one wants to admit it, but humanity is under attack."

He could see that perked his interests as Shepard appeared thoughtful for a moment. "How do you mean?"

"While you've been sleeping, entire colonies have been disappearing. Human colonies. We believe it is someone working for the Reapers. Just as Saren and the geth aided Sovereign. You've seen it yourself. You bested all of them. That's just one reason why we chose you."

"I'm just one man. Why don't you work with the Alliance? They have plenty of forces that can be mobilised for protection."

"The Alliance suffered substantial losses fighting Sovereign. They're rebuilding and are stretched too thin to waste resources verifying the Reaper threat."

"That I remember," Shepard said quietly, and the Illusive Man took note of the bitterness in his tone.

"They're currently blaming these abductions on mercs and pirates. Far easier and more convenient."

"And a possible explanation and far easier to believe than a Reaper threat." Shepard was quiet for a moment, as if deep in thought, while the Illusive Man took another drag from his cigarette. He simply waited for his next question. "Okay, level with me here. Why me? For the amount of credits you spent bringing me back, you could have funded an entire army. And, let's be honest, I don't like you. Yeah, yeah, I don't actually know you. But seriously, I don't like you. And I definitely don't like your organisation. You should know I'm not going to cooperate with you."

"That we'll see, Commander. However, as to why. Let's just say that you're unique. Not just in ability or what you've experienced. It's what you represent. You stood for humanity at a key moment. You're more than a soldier. You're a symbol."

Shepard shook his head. "I'm not a hero. I'm not a symbol. I'm just a soldier. I'm just one man…"

"That's where you're wrong, Commander. You're much more than just a man to many people. Not just in the Alliance but also within my organisation. I don't know if the Reapers understand fear, but you killed one. They have to respect that."

"But a few missing colonists isn't exactly harvesting all organic life in the galaxy."

"Hundreds of thousands of colonists have vanished, Commander. I'd say that fits the definition of 'harvesting'."

"Seriously? Hundreds of thousands?" The Illusive Man nodded. _He's interested at least. If he wasn't, he wouldn't be asking questions otherwise._ "And no-one has noticed a pattern?"

"No. The abductions are completely random and occur in remote locations."

"Why are they attacking humanity?"

"That's what we don't know and what we intend to find out. I can only assume that you got their attention when you killed one of them."

"Why are you involved?"

"Cerberus are committed to the advancement and preservation of humanity. If the Reapers are targeting us, trying to wipe us out, Cerberus will stop them."

Silence again descended as Shepard appeared to chew on his words. The Illusive Man simply took another drag of his cigarette. _You're h__uman, Shepard. It's a human problem. You may not buy into Cerberus but you'll want to help humanity. You'll want to fight. You'll want to protect the innocent. And you'll want to protect the colonists. I know you, Shepard. I've got your entire history on file. This is a fight you will want to be in. This is a fight you will want to win._

He heard Shepard sigh. "If what you say is true, if the Reapers are behind this then and if colonists are disappearing without a known cause, and if... and this is a big fucking if, but if the Alliance and the Council are unable or unwilling to help, then… fuck, I can't believe I'm going to say this, I may consider helping. I'm a human. This is a human problem. I'd feel like a complete ass if I sat on the sidelines and didn't help, though I'm also going to feel like a fucking hypocrite helping you."

The Illusive Man just took a drag on his cigarette, pondering his words. _That was almost easier than I expected. I doubt he'll ever trust me but if he does the job, then so be it. _The Illusive Man then took another drag of his cigarette as he turned and walked back to his chair, taking a seat as he grabbed hold of his glass tumbler.

"Don't take my word for it, Commander. I'd be disappointed if you accepted any of this without seeing for yourself. I have a shuttle ready to take you to Freedom's Progress, the latest colony to be abducted. Miranda and Jacob will brief you."

Shepard laughed. "You expect me to trust them? Miranda is a cold-hearted bitch. Jacob's nothing more than a mercenary. Quite frankly I'd rather work alone."

"Miranda saved your life in more ways than one. She deserves your thanks, at least. As for Jacob, he's a soldier. One of my best. He's never fully trusted me, and to his credit, he's always been honest about it. You don't have to trust me or them for the moment, Commander. But you'll be fine with them for now."

"Do I have a choice, or am I being 'volunteered'?"

"You always have a choice. If you don't find the evidence we're both looking for, we can part ways. All I can do is ask that you go to Freedom's Progress. Find any clues you can. Who's abducting the colonists? Do they have any connection to the Reapers? I brought you back for one reason, Commander. It's up to you to do the rest."

Shepard said nothing else but gave a slight nod of the head as if in agreement. Satisfied that he had nothing more to say, the Illusive Man keyed a code on a small holographic display on his chair and the hologram of Shepard disappeared. The Illusive Man took a sip of bourbon from his glass tumbler, feeling the liquid slightly burn on its way down his throat before settling in his stomach. He then followed that with another drag from his cigarette before he turned his chair around and looked at the massive red ball glowing only a few million kilometres away.

* * *

><p>"So what do you think?"<p>

Miranda looked up from her terminal at Jacob as she continued to type away, raising an eyebrow at the question. "About what, Jacob?"

"The Commander. Were you expecting that level of hostility?"

She stopped typing for a moment. It wasn't a surprising question. "Honestly, no. I've read plenty of reports. I'm aware of what happened with Commander Shepard and his run-ins with Cerberus two years ago. But, no, I wasn't expecting that level of hostility. That level of hatred. And for him to be so uncooperative. I believe in the Illusive Man but I wonder what he will say to try and convince Shepard that we're here to help."

Hoping that answered his question, she returned to typing though she noticed Jacob continue to pace in thought. _Something is on his mind. Just spit it out, Jacob._

"There has to be a reason for this hostility. Back on Lazarus, all I said was that I was part of Cerberus and he was about ready to kill me. I'm still left with the uneasy feeling that he'd like nothing more than putting a bullet in both of us and heading back to the Citadel, or at the very least the Alliance." Jacob stopped pacing, leaning forward on the desk, hands spread apart as he looked at Miranda. "Level with me here, Miranda. What happened two years ago?"

"Jacob, I'm being completely honest when I say I don't know. I've only got the most basic reports possible. As I said, all I'm aware is that Shepard had numerous run-in with a Cerberus cells two years ago. The Illusive Man says many of those were rogue cells."

Jacob scoffed. "And you believed him?"

"He has no reason to lie to me."

"The Commander is a good man, Miranda. I've read his dossier. There is nothing in there that would suggest he would ever contemplate joining us, no matter what we believe Cerberus stands for. His only failing, from what I have read myself, is the fact he drinks a lot at times, and even then, that's all pretty much suppressed by Councillor Anderson. And that alone doesn't make him a bad man, it's merely a flaw. There must be a reason why he, quite frankly, hates us and Cerberus."

She shrugged. "As I said, I'm not privy to all the information about what happened between the Commander and Cerberus two years ago." Jacob raised an eyebrow, still clearly sceptical while Miranda simply sighed, placing both her hands firmly on the table in front of her, glaring at the man in front of her. "You can believe me or not, Jacob. The fact is that my main role was to make sure Commander Shepard was brought back to life just as he was. The boss was more than likely aware of his personal feelings towards our organisation. Quite frankly it's up to him to convince the Commander that, in the end, our ideals are the same."

"While we're left with the fall out of dealing with someone who will more than likely be expecting a bullet in the back from one of us sometime in the future."

"It's what we signed up for, Jacob. As for his personal feelings, we'll just have to deal with him when the time comes."

"I wouldn't put it like that, Miranda."

"You know what I mean, Jacob. We'll see what the Commander says when he's done with his meeting with the boss. If he's somehow managed to convince him to help us, then we'll just have to follow that up by earning his trust."

"You think he'll ever learn to trust us?"

"I'm confident that he'll eventually be willing to accept us as part of his team."

Jacob suddenly straightened, looking past Miranda, causing her to turn around as she noticed Shepard exit the conference room. She folded her arms, waiting for the Commander to say something, who simply stopped in his tracks, scratching the back of his neck, looking very uncomfortable.

"Well, how did it go, Commander?" Miranda asked.

Shepard cleared his throat. "We're going to Freedom's Progress." She must have let a look of surprise cross her face as Shepard smirked. "Your boss put forward a good enough argument for me to assist for the moment. I will at least investigate the colony and find out what happened."

She gestured behind her with a thumb. "There's a weapons locker on the far wall where you can grab some new kit. There's also another locker in the next room where you can grab some new armour if you wish."

"I'm happy with the armour I have, but I would like an assault rifle at least. Maybe even a shotgun."

"I understand you are also proficient with a sniper rifle as well."

"I like to think I'm talented but I knew someone who was better. Can't remember if I ever told him that." She noticed his face fall as a memory, clearly suppressed, came to the surface. "Too late now, I guess," he said quietly.

"Grab what you want, Commander. We'll be ready when you give the word."

Shepard disappeared with Jacob while she finished up writing her report regarding everything that had occurred since Shepard had been woken. _Hostile. Uncooperative. Clear hatred for Cerberus. But I'll win him around to the cause. Shepard is human. He'll want to help in the end._ She looked up to see the Commander grab a standard Avenger, giving it the once over while discussing something with Jacob. She noticed Jacob suddenly laugh at whatever the Shepard said. _He seems to have struck up a rapport with Jacob at least. Maybe it's a soldier thing? We'll definitely need to get hold of better weaponry as well. Jacob can handle that. Plenty of opportunities during the mission to stock up as well._ Miranda signed off her report and sent it to the Illusive Man. He wasn't always forthcoming with praise but she knew he would be happy with progress so far. _Not that I need a thank you. I know he appreciates my skills. _She flicked off the terminal, grabbed her pistol and holstered it then walked across to where Shepard and Jacob were still talking.

"Ready, Commander?"

Shepard nodded. "Let's go."

She led the way to the shuttle, opening the door and ushering her companions on before closing the door behind her and taking a seat next to Jacob. She watched the Commander out of the corner of her eye as the shuttle's engine fired up and departed the station for the colony. _He certainly appears more relaxed. Perhaps this is just Shepard in 'soldier mode'._ He certainly appeared in contemplative mood as he simply stared out the window into space. She thought he looked slightly lost. _Come on, Miranda. He's just woken up after two years and everything has changed. Think how he must be feeling._ She shook her head. That thought was soft. Shepard was a soldier. Adapt and survive. It's what she had been doing her entire life. She pulled up her omni-tool to check their progress.

"We should be there shortly, Commander. The Illusive Man put us under your command. Do you have any orders?"

Shepard smirked. "Interesting. Will you be comfortable with that, being under my command?" She didn't miss that he looked directly at her.

"We didn't bring you back from the dead to second-guess you, Commander," Jacob replied, "If the Illusive Man says you're in charge, then you're in charge."

"Good. As long as you remember that," Shepard stated, still looking directly at her. She couldn't help but glare back before averting her eyes._ Okay, so he's cooperating for the moment but still clearly hostile towards us. But at least he's still here. Progress, I guess._ "I'm intrigued as to why you think this investigation will turn up anything new?" he asked.

"At other colonies, official investigators got their first. Sometimes even looters or scavengers before we got a chance to look. We're hoping to be the first team in this time. Maybe find clues before someone disturbs the scene."

"What have you found previously?"

"Nothing. No signs of attack, no corpses. Whoever is behind this, they just disappear."

"What are you orders once we are ground-side, Commander?" she asked.

"Find survivors. Find someone, anyone, who can provide information on who is behind this."

"That's unlikely, Commander. No-one was left at the other colonies. They were completely deserted."

"It would be nice to find somebody, though," Jacob added, "Anything's better than another ghost town."

The shuttle pilot announced they were coming into land, Shepard standing up and grabbing one of the handles as she felt the thruster's fire and the shuttle bounce slightly as it touched down on the surface. The door opened automatically and Shepard stepped out, taking the assault rifle from his back as he made a sweep of the landing zone. He turned and gestured for them to follow.

"Let's do this," he stated as he walked towards the first pre-fab building.


	13. Chapter 3 - True Tears of Joy

The small ship, filled with a dozen or so quarians, slowly drifted over the human colony of Freedom's Progress. They had tried to establish contact with someone – anyone – on the ground, to no avail. Reports had reached the Migrant Fleet of entire human colonies disappearing. Rumours that the Collectors, an alien race few people had ever had contact with, were behind the abductions. The quarians had one simple mission. Extract the quarian living within the human colony, and escape as quickly as possible.

Leading the mission was Tali'Zorah vas Neema. It had been three months since the conversation with Admiral Raan that had left her thinking long and hard about her life. She still carried the memory of Shepard in her heart and mind, but she had taken her Auntie's advice, and had become more focused on her own life since that evening. She finally understood that it was time to move on. Her role as an engineer on the _Neema_ had since expanded, and she had also taken a more senior role in regards to quarian operations throughout the galaxy. Her father still said little to her in regards to her progression, but she was now slightly more understanding of the distance between the two. Tali's progression had been so advanced that she had been designated the commander of the current mission, something which not all marines on board the ship were entirely pleased about, though they had kept that opinion to themselves. For now, at least.

She stood up as the ship slowly descended into the colony, looking over the group of marines, and also the three scientists who had also been chosen to accompany the mission. They had been selected in the event they could find any evidence of why these colonies were disappearing. Although what was happening was seen as a purely human problem, any evidence they may find could be of a benefit to the Migrant Fleet.

"Mission details as follow," she started, "We are to extract Veetor'Nara as quickly as possible. We anticipate no human aggression or opposition to our arrival and mission, though the colony may be startled to find a quarian vessel arriving, but so far, we have been unable to contact anyone on the ground. Therefore, marines, be on your guard."

"Aye, ma'am," the marines responded as one.

"Tali'Zorah, I just noticed a quarian running through the colony alone. That could only be Veetor," stated the pilot, "He was running away from us at the far end of the colony, towards a warehouse."

"Thank you, Han'Solo. Okay, as discussed, Obi'Wan, you will lead Marine One. I will lead Marine Two. Bear in mind that we will be primarily dealing with civilians. It is highly unlikely they will be armed. The information we have obtained about this colony is that there are only mining operations, with few defensive measures in place."

"So you're saying this colony is completely undefended?" asked one of the marines.

Tali nodded. "It's not completely undefended. I believe there may be automated defences. But I'm not aware of the presence of any Alliance forces."

"Strange that the Alliance would leave one of their colonies relatively undefended in this region of space."

Silence descended once again as the ship touched down on the ground. Tali opened the door, expecting to find at least someone waiting there for them, if anything to ask what they were doing there. But the landing pad was completely deserted. She already had a sense of foreboding about the operation, ever since they received no response from the ground to their hails. Now that they had touched down, the silence was almost overwhelming. She looked across the colony and couldn't see a single person. She pulled the shotgun from the small of her back and turned to face her squad.

"Move out," she ordered.

In teams of six, the two groups moved out. She led her squad down a set of stairs, past a number of pre-fab housing units. Silence still reigned, not even the sounds of insects could be heard. Three pre-fabs stood in a semi-circle, splitting her squad into teams of two, each taking a unit to search. Taking a deep breath, she walked quickly over to one unit, taking cover to the side of the door. She looked across at her companion and nodded.

"Okay, Lia'Shar, punch it."

Lia pressed the button to open the door, Tali moving in quickly, slightly crouched, shotgun in hand. She searched all four corners of the room in quick success. Although dark, she could see the room was completely empty. They moved further into the house, checking the kitchen, bedrooms, even bathroom. Nothing, the house was deserted. She exited the house back into the small square. The other two teams reported no sign of any inhabitants. Everyone had disappeared.

"I don't like this," stated one of the marines, with a hint of nerves, "Something isn't right. Where is everyone?"

She was about to respond when a message came through to all their ear-pieces.

_Tali'Zorah, Cerberus shuttle inbound! Approaching from the north-west._

"Cerberus! What are they doing here?" her second in command, Prazza, asked.

"I don't know. And I'd rather we didn't find out. We need to find Veetor ASAP and leave. Move out."

Quickly the team of six descended further into the colony. And ran into mechs. To their complete surprise, the mechs then started firing at them.

"They shouldn't be firing at us!" yelled Prazza, taking his assault rifle from his back and returning fire.

She keyed her omni-tool, one of the mechs exploding seconds later. "Veetor must have reprogrammed them. He's likely scared senseless. You read the report about his personality."

"Great!" replied Prazza, heavy sarcasm in his tone.

The mechs were handled with relative ease by the quarian marine team, Tali signalling for them to move out once safety was assured. She could see the mining operation was further in the distance, as the colony appeared to be built into a mountainside, but there was no sign of any colonists in all the units that they searched. She grew ever more concerned with each unit checked that was empty. The marine was correct. Something wasn't right. _Where is everyone? _The squad were walking through an office where they came to a halt.

"Tali'Zorah, I have a suggestion."

"What is it, Prazza?"

"Why don't we leave our Cerberus friends a little surprise?"

"What sort of surprise?"

"I was thinking a little bomb. If they landed at that secondary landing pad, and are moving in the same direction we are, they will likely come through here."

She thought for a moment. She had no love for Cerberus at all. She remembered hunting Cerberus with Shepard while chasing Saren. She remembered seeing the dreadful things the organisation carried out, apparently on behalf of humanity's progress. She remembered Kohaku. Toombs. Nodacrux. She remembered the hatred Shepard had for Cerberus.

Then there was the incident that had happened months ago, when Cerberus had invaded the Migrant Fleet, causing significant damage to one of their ships, all so they could hunt down a frightened human girl, who had tremendous biotic abilities. She had since been sent away with a team of quarians in the hope of keeping her safe, and out of Cerberus hands.

She turned to Prazza, a slight smile on her lips behind her mask. "Do it, Prazza."

She leaned back against the wall, deep in thought, as the marine's got to work. She was barely alert when the door at the far end of the unit suddenly, in walking three heavily armed Cerberus operatives. Two were not wearing a helmet, one a darker human male, the other a white human female. The middle operative was wearing a helmet, leaving his face unrecognisable. But he was clearly in the lead. She stood up, tempted to reach for her shotgun, but she didn't want to escalate the situation. However, the marines were already braced, weapons primed to fire.

"Stop right there!" ordered Prazza.

"Hold fire," stated the middle Cerberus operative, clearly a male, who gestured with his right hand to stop, though weapons were still aimed towards her group. Tali cocked her head to the side. _Why does that voice sound so familiar?_ She took a moment to look at the armour of the middle operative. The other two were clearly Cerberus. She knew that symbol well enough after what happened back on the fleet. The middle operative wore simple black armour, a red and white stripe down his right arm, with only a small N7 symbol on the breastplate. _What is an N7 operative doing working with Cerberus?_

"What are quarians doing on Freedom's Progress, Commander?" asked the female.

"I'm not sure. Why don't we ask them?" replied the helmeted operative, who then stored his weapon on his back.

_He's confident to do that with five armed marines pointing weapons at him._

"Hello, Tali," stated the lead operative.

She cocked her head slightly to the side again. "You know my name?" She then observed the operative take off his helmet. The same short, dark brown hair. His face was lined with scars that glowed red. His once blue eyes also had hints of red, but they were still the same. Then he grinned. That same grin he always had for her. She almost fainted, holding the table next to her to steady herself. Her heart was beating furiously. Her mouth was dry.

_It can't be!?_

"Shepard?" she whispered.

"It's me, Tali," the man who looked like Shepard replied quietly.

"It can't be," she whispered again, closing her eyes and shaking her head, disbelieving the man in front of her could really be him, "You can't be him. You're… No. He's dead."

"I'm not taking any chances with Cerberus operatives!" stated Prazza, rifle still aimed directly at Shepard.

"Put those weapons down!" she demanded, recomposing herself. She needed to know. She turned to face him, taking a step closer, her eyes almost on stalks. "Shepard? Is that really you? You're alive?" _Keelah, two years! Two years I've thought you were dead. And you turn up here. Right now._

"It's me, Tali. I can prove it, too."

"How?"

She noticed the grin form. "Remember when I gave you that geth data? You remember how I handed it to you in my quarters, and then we had dinner together afterwards? Almost like a date? Did it help you complete your Pilgrimage? How's your father, by the way?"

She gasped. Only Shepard could have known all that. She almost grinned herself in return before nodding. "I remember, Shepard," she said softly, "And father is well, too. And the geth data has proven invaluable to our understanding. Thank you." She turned to her colleagues. "Marines, weapons down. This is definitely Commander Shepard."

Prazza looked at the marines beside him, before he nodded and stored his rifle. There were plenty of murmurs of disagreement. She could read in their tense body language that they simply wanted to kill Shepard and the other two humans. She turned to look at him again. He simply stared back at her. She ran her eye over him. Apart from his face, which she had to admit was a bit of a mess, he looked, well, like Shepard.

"Why is your old commander working with Cerberus?" asked Prazza

"I don't know, Prazza. Maybe we should ask?" she replied, turning to Shepard.

"From what I've been told, Cerberus apparently rebuilt me, but I'm definitely not taking their orders, Tali. Trust me on that one," Tali noticing the smirk on his face, while the female beside him clearly smouldered in anger. "There's a lot that I need to explain, and I promise I will tell you everything later. But we're investigating why the colonists are going missing. Why are you here?"

"One of our people was here on Pilgrimage. His name is Veetor. We came to find him."

"If Veetor survived the attack, he may be able to tell us what happened," he suggested.

"That's the hope. We've seen him, but he might not be in the best state to answer questions. He was injured, and, well, nervous…"

"Tali means he was unstable, Commander," added Prazza, "Combine that with the damage to his suit's CO2 scrubbers and an infection from an open-air exposure, and he's likely delirious."

"When he saw us landing, he hid in a warehouse on the far side of town. We suspect he also programmed the mechs to attack anything that moved," Tali explained.

"Time for me to rescue another quarian on Pilgrimage?" Tali couldn't help but smile behind her mask at the memory. She continued to stare at Shepard, quiet for a moment. It was almost like the previous two years hadn't happened. "Tali, Veetor is the only one who can tell us what happened here. We should work together to find him," Shepard suggested.

She grinned, and nodded in agreement. "Good idea, Shepard. You'll need two teams to get past the drones, anyway."

"Hang on, Tali, now we're working with Cerberus?" asked Prazza, voice edged with concern and more than a little sarcasm.

She sighed, and looked at her companion. "No, Prazza, you're working with me. If you can't follow orders, go wait on the ship."

She turned back to Shepard to see an even larger grin on his face, almost as if trying to suppress laughter. "New side to you, eh Tali? Giving orders now too? It suits you."

Tali knew she blushed under her mask before she continued. "Head for the warehouse through the centre of the colony. We'll circle around the far side and draw off some of their drones to clear you a path."

"Sounds like a plan. Stay safe, Tali. Keep in radio contact."

"Will do. Good luck, Shepard. It's good to have you back."

Understatement of the century, she thought, as she walked out of the office, taking one last look back at Shepard, who stood there staring at her, still with that slight grin on his face, simply watching her as she walked away. She tried hard not to look back again and again, to make sure it wasn't a dream. She sighed as she walked out the door. _Why didn't at least I hug him?_

"I can't believe you're trusting Cerberus, Tali'Zorah!" Prazza argued, once out of earshot of the other three.

"I'm not trusting Cerberus, Prazza. I'm trusting Shepard."

Prazza scoffed. "Of course you do. Everyone knows you had, or obviously now continue to have, a soft spot for that human."

She grabbed Prazza by the arm, stopping her team. "And what does that mean?"

"There are plenty of rumours, Tali'Zorah. About the relationship you had with Shepard while you were on pilgrimage."

_What rumours? I've never said anything to anyone other than Raan to insinuate we were anything more than friends? _"Shepard was a good friend to me. And to plenty of other quarians we met. He also helped me complete my pilgrimage. He's a good man."

"If he's such a good man, then why, by the Ancestor's, is he working with Cerberus?" asked Prazza, who was clearly exasperated with the situation.

"I don't know, Prazza," she replied, voice softer, feeling slightly unsure, "We'll have to ask him once we find Veetor." _There has to be a reason? Shepard would not willingly work for them. I'll have to try and get hold of him alone. Ask him where he's been. What he's been up to. Must be something if he hasn't been in contact._

Prazza looked ready to argue more, until security drones flew overhead, ending the argument. Omni-tools were keyed and rifles fired as the drones were quickly despatched. She held a hand to her ear-piece.

"Be careful, Shepard. There's a squad of security drones heading to your position."

"_Thanks for the warning_," came a voice, "_We'll take care of them_." She assumed that was the other male with Shepard.

Tali and her squad of marines moved out, deeper into the colony. The occasional drone flew overhead, but she found that most of the mechs and drones appeared to be heading towards Shepard and his companions. She almost felt guilty sending them right through the middle of the colony, but if that really was Shepard, he wouldn't have a problem dealing with a few useless mechs.

"Tali, we can't let Cerberus get their hands on Veetor. We must move quickly, grab him and get out of here now."

"But I promised Shepard we would help him!"

"I don't care what you promised, Tali. You have shown to be ineffective in command. I can't believe you would even consider trusting Cerberus after everything that happened."

"Watch your words, Prazza. I gave you an order."

"Then consider yourself relieved of command, Tali. We'll see what the Admiralty Board has to say about all this. Marines, with me. We're going to get Veetor now."

_Bosh'tet! _Tali looked on helpless as Prazza and the marines ran off into the distance, running after them to prevent them doing something that would get them all killed.

"Shepard! Prazza and the rest of my squad rushed on ahead. I told them to wait, but they wouldn't listen!"

"_We'll be there in a moment, Tali. Hold on!_" replied Shepard. She didn't miss the sound of gunfire in the background.

"They want to find Veetor and take him away before you get here!"

"_Figured they would considering who I'm here with. Don't worry, Tali_."

"_We should have expected this_," stated a female voice. The other human, Tali assumed.

"_Come on! We can still catch them!_" stated the other male.

She continued to chase after Prazza and his squad. Soon they were in the docks and close to where they had seen Veetor enter a warehouse. The group had continued to knock out any mechs they came across, but she slowed to a walk. It was suddenly too quiet.

"Heavy mech! Run!" came a shout from in front of her, as she rounded a corner and skidded to a stop. A machine gun started up, Tali scampering backwards as she watched Prazza and his squad return fire, ineffective as it was, as the heavy mech slowly closed on them. She would have cried out as she watched the squad start to be cut down, but was too terrified herself to shout out as she turned and leapt for cover.

"Hurry, Shepard! We're inside the loading docks! Veetor reprogrammed a heavy mech. It's tearing Prazza's squad apart!"

"_They did want to get to Veetor first_," added the female human. She took note of the sarcasm. _She's right, though. And now my team is being decimated. What a stupid bunch of… _She stayed in cover, trying to ignore the continuous rate of fire coming from behind her. She looked behind her to see the loading bay doors were closed, the only way Shepard and his companions could enter where she was currently hiding.

"Shepard, get your squad into cover and I'll open the loading bay doors."

She keyed her omni-tool, using a hacking program which she hoped work, while turning around to see nearly all her squad decimated by the heavy mech, machine gun firing while a rocket was fired towards the second squad, who had closed on their position. Her heart sank as she saw her friends and colleagues massacred. She ducked as heavy machine gun fire peppered her position with bullets as it slowly closed in on where she was hidden. She could hear the mechanical clicks and whirs of the machine close on her position. She chanced looking around the corner from cover, looking up to see the barrel of the machine gun aimed right at her. She gulped and closed her eyes.

"Get away from her, you son of a bitch!" she heard someone yell, turning to see Shepard run straight past her towards the heavy mech, his assault rifle firing again and again, the heavy mech unable to return fire as he peppered all the right places to stop it responding. A slight grin spread across her face. _That's the Shepard I remember! _She almost gasped as Shepard ran straight at and then sliding _under_ the heavy mech, rolling out behind it. The mech failed to turn, being under sustained fire from the other two humans. Now behind it, Shepard took out the rocket launcher he carried on his back, launching 3 rockets into the back of the heavy mech. She understood the reasoning, mechs such as this only had light protection on its back. Shepard then threw the useless launcher to the ground, taking out his assault rifle again and started laying down another sustained burst of fire.

His two companions were launching tech attacks of their own. With the sustained pressure, the mech soon blew up into a ball of flame, parts scattered across the area. She stood up out of the cover she was hidden. Shepard was busy stowing his rifle and picked up his launcher, storing both back on his back. He looked up and grinned as she approached.

"Haven't changed much, Shepard," she stated with a slight chuckle.

He looked slightly sheepish. "You always said I was a little bit crazy. Are you okay?" he asked, closing into her personal space, like he always did. He reached out to touch her, then seemed to think for a moment and stopped, and put his hand back to his side.

She gave a slight grin behind her mask. _He hasn't changed in that regard. _"I'm fine, Shepard. Thanks. I'll tend to my wounded men. Please, go find Veetor. I'll be with you in a minute."

Shepard appeared ready to say something, before giving a small nod, gathered his team to him and walked off in the direction of where they believed Veetor was currently hiding. Tali watched as he walked off, before she turned and walked into one of the housing units. What remained of her squad were busy tending to their wounds. Lia'Shar had survived, at least.

"Quite the hero, your Shepard?"

Tali could only chuckle. "He certainly hasn't changed on the battlefield it seems."

"Are you sure you can trust him, Tali? He's working with Cerberus."

"Shepard has always been honest with me, Lia. I'll just have to ask him what is going on. I'll have to talk to him alone, without those other two humans who are with him. Shepard wouldn't willingly work with Cerberus. I know him too well for that."

"I'm sorry about your squad, Tali. You did everything you could to keep them alive."

"Don't be. Prazza and the rest of them were fools. Though I have no doubt I'll be getting plenty of questions when we get back to the Flotilla."

"I heard the radio transmissions, Tali. He disobeyed a direct order from his commanding officer. You did nothing wrong in that regard. However, you will likely have to answer questions about co-operating with Cerberus. And about Shepard."

She sighed. "I know." She tended to her squad for a few minutes, making sure the survivors had no issues with their suits and that any wounds had been as mended as much as possible. "Start returning to the shuttle when possible. Lia, come with me. We're going to get Veetor."

With that order given, Tali and Lia started walking over the warehouse where they knew Veetor had hidden. She approached the door carefully, seeing Shepard and the two other humans speaking to Veetor. He was still very nervous, though Tali couldn't be sure if it was about speaking to the humans, or if was something else entirely. She just motioned to Lia to hold position for the moment and see how the conversation played out. She still trusted Shepard, even after all this time, even despite Cerberus, and was hoping that he only wanted information for his mission. She smiled as she saw Shepard stood next to Veetor, a hand lightly on his shoulder, almost as if to comfort him.

_That's the Shepard I remember._

"My God. I think it's a Collector!" gasped Miranda.

"What's a Collector?" asked Shepard.

"They're an alien species from beyond the Omega 4 relay, Commander. No-one has ever really seen one before," replied Jacob.

"They usually work through intermediaries, like slavers or hired mercenaries. If they're involved with the Reapers somehow, it could explain what happened with the colonists, Commander."

"The Collectors have advanced technology. They could have a weapon that disables an entire settlement at once," added Jacob.

Tali was speechless as she watched the images on the screen. Like most people in the galaxy, she was aware of the Collectors by name but knew little else about them. She listened in further. The fact that Freedom's Progress was effectively undefended meant the colony didn't stand a chance.

"The seeker swarms. No-one can hide. The seekers find you. Freeze you. Then the monsters take you away."

"How did you escape, Veetor?" asked Shepard.

"Swarms couldn't find me. Monsters didn't know I was here."

"Hmmm. Interesting. Maybe it was the enviro-suit worn by the quarians that protected him," suggested Jacob.

"And technology used by the Collectors may be designed to only target humans. It makes sense," added Miranda.

"Okay, Veetor, what happened with the colonists?" asked Shepard.

"The monsters took the people onto the ship, and then they left. The ship flew away. But they'll be back for me. No-one escapes!"

"You'll be okay, Veetor. They are not coming back," Shepard said, hoping to reassure the clearly frightened quarian, "And thanks. You've been very helpful."

"I studied them. The monsters. The swarms. I recorded them with my omni-tool. Lots of readings. Electro-magnetic. Dark energy," said Veetor as he started keying his omni-tool.

"We need that information, Shepard. Grab the quarian, call the shuttle, and we'll get out of here," suggested Miranda.

"Like hell you will!" Tali shouted as she stormed into the room, Shepard and the two other humans turning around in surprise. "Veetor needs medical attention. He needs treatment, not an interrogation!"

"We won't hurt him," stated Jacob, "We just need to see if he knows anything else. He'll be returned unharmed."

Miranda then spoke up. "Your people tried to betray us once already. If we give him to you, we'll never get the intel we need."

"Prazza was an idiot, and he and his men paid for it. Take Veetor's omni-tool data, but leave Veetor with us. Shepard, please?" Tali knew she was pleading. She was out-numbered 3 to 2. _If this really is Shepard, he'll make the right choice._

"Of course, Tali." Shepard turned to the two Cerberus operatives. "Veetor goes back to the flotilla. The omni-tool data will have all the information we need. A clearly traumatized person will not be the greatest source of information."

Miranda opened her mouth to say something, probably argue, but a glare from Shepard ended any possible interruption. Tali smiled beneath the mask. "Thank you, Shepard. I'm glad you're still the one giving the orders." She turned to her colleague. "Lia, take Veetor back to our shuttle." The other quarian nodded, and carefully took Veetor in arm, and slowly walked out of the room.

"You two, head back to the shuttle. I'll be there in a few minutes." The pair looked at each other, then back to Shepard. Miranda looked ready to say something again, but another glare from Shepard led to a simple nod of the head before the pair turned and walked out themselves.

When they were finally alone, Shepard and Tali stood apart. Neither appeared sure of what to say. Or what to do. Tali had a million emotions bubbling to the surface as she was finally alone with Shepard. Sadness. Doubt. Anger. Hurt. Grief. A million questions flew through her mind. She walked forward and stood right in front of Shepard, barely a pace apart. She looked up into his eyes. His were searching her own.

Then she slapped him across the face. It was an automatic reaction. She immediately regretted it. Shepard looked back at her, slight shock in his face, though also with a slight grin, almost as if he had expected such a reaction.

"You promised me, Shepard. That you would be okay. Then I listened to you die," she whispered, laying the hand that had just slapped him on his chest, "I watched your heartbeat stop on the monitor. I heard your final words, while I sat in that life-pod. You promised me that you'd be okay. How can I even know it's you and you're not some… some sort of clone? How is this even possible?" She took a step back. Now the anger flowed through her veins. Cerberus. His broken promise. Was it really Shepard? She crossed her arms against her chest. "And you're working with Cerberus? Of all the organisations, you're back with them," she spat the final word, "The Shepard I remember hated Cerberus. He spent months eliminating all the operations we could find. You can't be him. You just can't be..."

Shepard took a deep breath. He seemed to deflate. She watched him run a hand down his face, then up and through his short hair. "As far as I'm aware, Tali, I've been dead for two years. The last thing I remember is floating away from the Normandy as it blew up. I woke up the other day in a Cerberus facility, which was under attack from a rogue agent. Since then, I've found out that Cerberus spent billions bringing me back, my old team split up to the ends of the galaxy and human colonies are disappearing. In all honesty, Tali, I have no idea what is going on." A wave of guilt overcame her. He was clearly telling the truth, clearly confused at everything happening to him. "But, even with all that, you know why I hate Cerberus. Why do you? There's something more than what happened during our chase for Saren, isn't there?"

"They attacked our fleet, Shepard. We were providing shelter for a young biotic girl who had escaped from Grissom Academy when it was attacked by Cerberus. They then tried to infiltrate one our ships, almost blew the ship up and killed a number of quarians when they invaded."

"I'm sorry, Tali, I didn't know. But, I promise you, I'm not working for Cerberus. I want to find out what is happening to these colonists. But that's it. Other than that… I don't know what I'm going to do. But, this I can also promise, I'm still me."

She looked at Shepard. She knew he was telling the truth. She could tell by the look in his eyes. She knew those well enough. But to see him so unsure was something new. She took a step closer to Shepard. Wringing her hands nervously. "Shepard," she spoke softly, "I've spent two years mourning you. And now you're back. And I don't know what to think. How can I be 100% sure that is really you? It's your face. Those are your eyes. You look and sound exactly the same. But how…."

She was silent as Shepard took a step towards her. And then embraced her. She could feel his arms hold her tight against him. She knew she simply melted into arms. Memories of the _Normandy_ flooded her mind. She could feel his hands on her back, pulling her even tighter. Only one emotion now flooded her mind.

Regret.

Two years of regret.

"I'm sorry, Tali…," he whispered.

"But… I don't… Shepard, you promised..." She could feel the tears, those expended over the past two years, slowly returning to her eyes.

He released her, but took her hands in his. He looked down into her mask. She looked back up at him. He opened and shut his mouth a couple of times, almost as if unsure of what to say. She cocked her head slightly, wondering what he was going to say. He appeared to take a deep breath before he spoke.

"Tali, do you ever think of the time we spent together on the Normandy?"

"All the time, Shepard," she replied softly.

"And do you ever wonder why I spent a lot of my free time with you? Why I shared everything with you? Why I always took you on my missions? How I said I enjoyed your company as we wandered the Citadel? How I would quite happily spend all my free time with you in engineering?"

"I thought you were just being friendly. You always said I was a close friend. And you needed someone to talk to. And you appreciated my abilities on missions."

"I did. I was… But, I was also stupid. I let, of all things, fear, stop me from saying what I felt."

"What do you mean, Shepard?"

"When I was spaced from the Normandy, I had only one regret, Tali. There was one thought I had when I died, and there was one thought I had when I woke up yesterday. It was of one person." She just looked up, staring into Shepard's eyes. _Me? No, he couldn't possibly… could he? _"That thought was of you, Tali. I went to my apparent death with that one regret."

"What are you saying, Shepard?" she asked, her voice quieter but her heart pounding.

"My only regret, Tali, is that I never told you… I never really told you how I really feel. Your friendship always meant a great deal to me. And I never wanted to jeopardise that. You meant the world to me. But, in my heart, I… Tali, I wanted more. But, I never really said anything. And I never said those three words. I didn't know if you'd feel the same. I thought you did, but part of me was also… scared. I was scared of how strong my feelings were for you. And I didn't know if you'd ever want more than friendship. I didn't think it would be possible. I mean, how would a relationship even work between us? But I couldn't help my feelings. But I never said anything. And I'm sorry."

She remained silent. _He feels the same way? He really does love me?_

"Tali?" asked Shepard, trying to search her face behind the mask.

She couldn't help but leap into his arms. She felt him wrap his arms around her again to complete the hug. "I've always felt the same, Shepard. Keelah, I've always felt the same. Why didn't you tell me, Shepard? I've mourned the man I…"

She stopped. _Can I tell him? _Shepard placed her back on the ground softly. Looked into her eyes again. A slight smile on his face. "Did you… I mean, do you feel the same way about me, Tali?"

She felt her face grow hot under the mask. _Just tell him the truth, bosh'tet. What's he going to say now? No? _Tali only nodded. A grin on her face, that Shepard couldn't see, but knew, instinctively, was on her face. _Damn this mask sometimes. _He moved his right hand to the side of her mask, lightly lifting her head at the same time. He looked into her eyes, shining behind her mask.

He smiled at her.

"Since that first day I met you on the Citadel, I knew you were special. I love you, Tali. I always have."

She simply broke down in tears. She wrapped her arms around Shepard again, shaking slightly as emotions overtook her again. To hear him say those words she had spent two years thinking she would never hear him say. "You have no idea how long I've waited to hear you say that… I love you, Shepard," she whispered.

"I'm sorry for being a bosh'tet," he replied softly. She couldn't help but chuckle in his arms at the use of the word. The two held each other for what felt like a lifetime, finally having shared feelings both had held since their first meeting on the Citadel. For her, it was more than two years of hurt finally at an end.

"How can you love me behind this suit and mask?" she asked quietly.

Shepard let go of her and held her at her sides. "Because they are not what define you, Tali. This," as he held the side of her mask, "or this," as he ran a hand down her suited arm, "are not what define you. This," as he placed a hand on her chest, over her heart, "is what defines you, Tali. You are the most extraordinary, selfless, intelligent person I've ever met. How could I not love the person you are?" She just continued to sob and nodded in response. "And it's not like I'm undamaged goods."

"What do you mean, Shepard?"

"Anytime I opened up to you on the old Normandy, and that time when we were stuck on the Citadel, I was either drunk or had been drinking. When did I ever completely open up to you sober? Most of the time, I went looking to solve my own problems at the bottom of a bottle. Then there's my past back on Earth. Even all this time later, I still find it embarrassing. A black mark on my conscience. Yet you didn't judge me for it, but there would be thousands or millions of people who would."

She nodded as memories returned. Shepard opening up about Kahoku. About his child-hood and life on the streets. About Elysium. After losing Ashley. And when he had been grounded. She remembered that the bottle had been there each time.

"What about now, Shepard?"

"As I told you that night. And as I told Kaidan something before we arrived on Ilos. I found someone to live and fight for. I found the answer. I found you." She nodded silently and wrapped her arms around Shepard again. The pair just held each other in silence. She didn't know how long they did and didn't care. She didn't want it to end. "But can you come with me, Tali? I'd love to have you by my side again. Someone I can trust completely."

She released her grip on Shepard and took a step back. She looked down and shook her head, wringing her hands again. "I can't, Shepard. Not right now. I want to. I really do. You probably have no idea how much. I know I said until the end… But the work I'm doing is very important. I would tell you but…"

Shepard sighed. "Cerberus," he said flatly. It wasn't a question. It was a statement. She felt guilty about not being able to tell him. But he was with… them. Even if _he_ wasn't.

She nodded her head. Shepard sighed again. She knew he was disappointed. "I can't be exact, but I'll tell you this. It's to do with the geth. And will help my people. That's how important it is," she explained, giving as much detail as she could without being explicit.

Shepard nodded. "I understand, Tali. Truly, I do. I know how important it is to you that you help your people." She grinned behind her mask. "But you believe me? About Cerberus?" he asked. She looked him over again. His eyes were pleading with her to believe him. She was not used to the Commander being so unsure.

"Of course, Shepard. I know it really is you. I don't know how or why. I just… do." She noticed him grin slightly at those words. "And I know you have your reasons for being with them. Good reasons. But, please, don't put trust in them. You know what Cerberus are capable of. You've seen it with your own eyes."

"It's an unfortunate means to an end, Tali. Apparently they are the only people interested in this problem, regarding the abductions. Trust me, I don't like it any more than you. And I certainly don't trust them. But, for the time being, they may be my only option."

"I trust you, Shepard. But, please, be careful."

"I will, Tali. But, you be careful, too. I don't know what you're doing in regards to the geth, but anything to do with them is bound to be dangerous." She nodded her head. "Now, would the lady like an escort back to her ship?"

She giggled. "The lady would be delighted, Commander."

He held out his hand, which she took great delight in holding, and together they walked back through the empty colony to her awaiting shuttle. Before she departed, they shared one final hug. Neither of them wanted to let go. She would have given anything to re-join Shepard. But, at the moment, what either wanted just wasn't possible. With a sigh, he released her, though still her by her sides, while he spoke.

"Keep in touch, Tali. You have my extranet address?"

"I do, and I will, Shepard."

"Tali?"

"Yes, Shepard?"

"Be careful. We've already lost each other once. I don't want to lose you again."

She smiled behind her mask. "I will, Shepard. You be careful as well. I've just got you back. And please don't trust them."

Shepard could only nod in agreement. With those words, she broke the hug completely, turned and boarded her ship. She took one final look back at Shepard before the door closed, the engines fired and the ship slowly ascended. She sat in the co-pilots chair as the ship accelerated away from the colony, a smile on her face.

_It was worth the wait._

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><p><em>AN So... phil and Rogen... happy? :-) (Honestly, hope it made your day. Know you've been waiting a long time for that. I'm sure I heard Phil yell 'Finally!')_


	14. Chapter 4 - Homeward Bound

_A/N - Just a quick note. Reached a milestone this week of followers so you all have my thanks!_

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><p>Tali wouldn't say she was feeling nervous but the fact she was currently sitting outside the conference room alone, where the Admiralty Board convened on a regular basis, would install a certain amount of fear in even the hardest of marines. Inside the room at the moment, apart from the five Admirals, was her friend and second-in-command from the mission, Lia'Shar. When her shuttle had arrived back from Freedom's Progress, minus a team of marines, questions were immediately raised and a thorough investigation started. She was aware that everyone else from the mission had already been questioned about events that occurred on Freedom's Progress. She knew Lia'Shar supported her, as well as most of the others from the mission, but facing the Admiralty Board alone was a daunting exercise.<p>

Mostly, though, she still couldn't believe everything that happened on Freedom's Progress. With Shepard. It seemed almost too good to be true. If she could pinch herself to check if she was dreaming, she would have. And for him to express his feelings of love as well…

_Am I dreaming? He was gone for two years and suddenly he's back in my life, almost like nothing has happened, as if the past two years were nothing but a nightmare I've finally woken from. And then he tells me he loves me!_

She had to stop the constant smile appearing on her face, although she knew no-one could actually see it, but her friends had already noted the extra bounce in her step and wondered what was going on. She had wanted to send him a message as soon as she had returned to the fleet, but didn't want to seem too eager. She thought back over the conversation and could see he was worried about his own circumstances regarding his apparent alliance with Cerberus. She could understand his worries and concern about his predicament. She was left believing that there was much more he could explain regarding his return which he just couldn't tell her at the time.

_I have to message him. See if he can tell me what has happened since the Normandy incident. Although I'm sure Cerberus track all his messages. I'll have to see how much he can say. Though he's always been honest with me. He may keep it short simply to protect me._

The doors to her left opened and out walked Lia'Shar, who turned and walked towards her, standing up as the other quarian approached.

"How did it go?" she asked.

Lia simply shrugged her shoulders. "I gave an honest account of what happened, Tali."

"Did the Admirals say anything to indicate what their opinion may be?"

"No, they asked some questions about what happened, my personal involvement and also my opinion regarding your command of the mission. I said you did nothing wrong, Tali. But Shepard and Cerberus were mentioned when questioned."

"I have no doubt I'll be receiving many questions about him, Lia. But thank you for your support."

"From what the Admirals told me, all crew that were on the mission to Freedom's Progress have been stood down indefinitely while the investigation is completed. Guess I'll just head back to my ship and get back to work."

"And I guess I'd better get ready to face the music," she muttered.

Lia lay a hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry, Tali. You'll be fine. Just be honest."

She nodded. "I will. Thanks, Lia. We'll catch up later."

Lia turned and walked away, Tali watching her for a few moments before she took a deep breath and walked through the doors to her left. Inside, the five Admirals were standing around a semi-circle table, waiting for her arrival. A small table and chair was sat in front of them, Tali approaching it but not taking a seat for now.

"Thank you for joining us, Tali'Zorah," stated Admiral Raan. She just nodded her head in deference.

"Please be seated, Tali'Zorah, so we can begin these proceedings," added Admiral Koris. She did as he requested and took the seat available, placing her hands together on the table in front of her.

"Tali'Zorah, we have requested your presence here to help our investigation regarding the mission events of Freedom's Progress. We have taken testimony from all your colleagues regarding the mission, and we are content to find that your leadership of the overall mission was acceptable, as the priority objective, that of retrieving Veetor'Nara, was successful," Admiral Raan continued. She let out of a slight sigh of relief. _There's a 'but' coming. I should bet on what it's about._ "But we do have questions regarding Cerberus and the apparent sighting of Commander Shepard." _And there it is!_

"Please explain your prior relationship with Commander Shepard to the board, Tali'Zorah," her father requested. She couldn't help but look back at him and glare, before turning her eyes back to Admiral Raan in the middle.

"As you are all aware, I first met Commander Shepard during my Pilgrimage. He rescued me from a life-threatening situation on the Citadel. He saved my life. I had information vital to his assignment at the time and he asked if I wished to accompany him on his mission to capture the rogue Spectre, Saren Arterius. During my time with Commander Shepard, he helped me procure the gift I handed over once my Pilgrimage was complete."

"Yet, according to your testimony at the time, Commander Shepard was killed in the destruction of his ship, the Normandy," her father replied.

"That is correct. Commander Shepard was deemed killed in action."

The five Admirals all shared looks before all turning their attention back to her. "Then how is it that Commander Shepard appears in your mission report?" asked Admiral Koris.

"Because, by a miracle, he's alive!" she replied, trying to keep all enthusiasm and happiness out of her tone. She knew she failed miserably.

"And working with Cerberus," Koris added.

"No!" she replied hastily, "Well, not exactly. It's… complicated," she finished.

"Well, keep this simple, Tali'Zorah. Is Commander Shepard working with Cerberus?" asked Admiral Gerrel.

"Shepard said he isn't. If Shepard tells me he isn't, then I believe him. He's never lied to me. It's a very long story and I don't think he even had time to tell me everything. But if you knew Shepard like I do," she noticed the Admirals again sharing a glance at her phrasing, "Then you would know that he would never willingly work with Cerberus."

"Can you give any explanation as to how an apparent dead man is alive?" Admiral Xen asked, "The science that would be involved beggars belief and would far surpass all our known understanding of medical science and technology."

She shrugged her shoulders. "Unfortunately I was not made aware of what procedures were undertaken to bring Commander Shepard back to life, if that is what happened. But Shepard said he had been dead for two years and Cerberus had spent billions rebuilding him. Money well spent in my opinion, Admirals."

"What is concerning, Tali'Zorah, is your willingness to ally yourself and your team with Cerberus during your own mission," stated Koris. She didn't fail to notice the accusing tone.

"I did not help Cerberus, Admiral," she replied, trying to keep the sarcasm at a minimum, "I helped Commander Shepard."

"Who is currently working with Cerberus!" argued Gerrel.

She let out a huff of frustration as the conversation was simply going round in circles. "It's not that simple! Human colonies have been going dark, just like Freedom's Progress. Thousands of humans have been disappearing for months. It's why I was sent on this mission in the first place. What Shepard discovered is that the Collectors are abducting colonists. For what purpose is unknown. Admirals, I can assure you that Shepard would not willingly work with Cerberus unless the situation was dire enough that it would require him to work with an organisation that I know he completely despises."

"Your defence of Commander Shepard is passionate, Tali'Zorah. Are your personal feelings about the Commander influencing your opinions?" asked her father.

That rendered her speechless for a moment. She looked back at Admiral Raan, who kept her body language unreadable. _Surely she hasn't said anything. And I never said anything remotely interesting about Shepard to my father. How would he know about that?_

_Oh, come on Tali, don't be foolish. You were miserable for at least 18 months after his death. Even your father, blind as you think he may be, would probably have noticed how much his death hurt me. Even Raan said the way I acted was similar to how father was after mother died._

"Whatever feelings I may have about Commander Shepard did not influence how I operated the mission," she replied flatly, "At the end of the day, Admirals, the mission was a success. The objective was completed. Yes, losing any marine is a loss for the fleet, but as has already been established, normal protocols were broken. Prazza's insubordination led to the death of himself and the rest of his team. A temporary alliance was formed with Commander Shepard and operatives from Cerberus during the mission to ensure its successful outcome. Once the mission was completed, any links with Cerberus and their operatives, including Commander Shepard, were broken." _Okay, that last bit is a slight lie, but what they don't know won't hurt them._

Silence descended upon the room as the Admirals whispered between themselves. She tried reading their body language but couldn't read much so gave up, instead sitting quietly with her hands clasped together on the table as she waited for their verdict. _Verdict? Am I on trial here? It certainly feels like it._ She wasn't particularly worried. At worst, she'll get her wrist slapped for choosing to cooperate with Cerberus. Realistically, she expected nothing more than being left out of a few missions and being stuck on the fleet for a while. Eventually the Admirals stopped conversing. _Here we go._

"Tali'Zorah, please stand," Admiral Raan requested. She did as she was requested, standing at attention, hands behind her back in front of the small table as the Admirals delivered their verdict. "The findings of the Admiralty Board are as follows. The objective of your mission was successfully completed. The Admiralty Board wish to convey their thanks for completing the mission. The deaths of the marines from your squad were due to the insubordination of squad member Prazza and will therefore be recorded as such. In regards to your contact and temporary alliance with Cerberus, the Admiralty Board believe that while personal feelings regarding Commander Shepard may have impacted your decision, this was not the detriment of your successful completion of the mission. Therefore, Tali'Zorah, you are free to go with our thanks for your cooperation."

She couldn't think of anything to do except nod her head slightly and offer her thanks. The Admirals stood and soon made their way out of the room through a door to their left, turning around and walking through the door in which she entered. Once through, she turned slightly to the left and leaned back against the wall, taking a deep sigh of relief.

_Right, I think it's time I send a message to Shepard as I think he may find all this amusing._

* * *

><p>The shuttle was quiet again as Shepard and his companions returned to Minuteman Station, though this time the silence was for an entirely different reason. Jacob and Miranda kept exchanging glances as Shepard sat staring out the window with what could only be described as a big, dumb grin on his face, not taking any notice of them.<p>

"What's he grinning about?" Miranda whispered.

"Hell if I know. Must be something to do with that quarian we met," Jacob replied.

Miranda thought for a moment. _Well, he did whisper her name when he woke up that time. Surely he doesn't actually have… feelings for someone stuck in a suit? That's so beneath someone like him._ "So, Shepard, what exactly happened back there on Freedom's Progress?" asked Miranda.

He stared out the window for a few moments longer before he turned his attention towards Miranda. "None of your business," he replied. Miranda bristled at the blunt retort.

"Good news, Commander? I only ask as you seem a lot happier than before the mission, if you don't mind me saying so, sir," Jacob asked, still trying to be friendly.

He nodded. "Yes, good news. It was nice to see an old friend, Jacob. For her, it's been over two years since she's seen me. For me, it feels like it's only been a few days."

"I take it you two were close, Commander?" Miranda asked, clearly inquisitive as to their relationship.

He was thoughtful for a moment, pondering how to reply to the question. _Should I be up front and honest for once? No. These are Cerberus operatives. They would quite happily and without compunction use Tali against me. Threaten her or somehow use my feelings for her against me. But… they are asking. Actually showing an interest. Maybe you could just be polite instead of being a complete ass the entire time._

"We were good friends, Miranda. She was of great help during my mission to capture Saren. Once we're done here, I hope to see her again soon."

"Very well, Commander."

The shuttle descended into silence as it arrived on Minuteman Station. The trio exited, Miranda heading to the same terminal as before while Jacob just took a seat, leaning back and looking relaxed. He wondered what exactly his role was for the moment. _Miranda's bodyguard? Unlikely. She's more than capable of looking after herself. He mentioned he spent time with the Alliance. I should see if I can get to know him a bit better. Don't think there's much chance with Miranda, but maybe I can reach him._

"The Illusive Man is waiting to speak to you again, Commander," Miranda announced.

He simply nodded and walked into the briefing room, standing in the exact same spot as before. After a few seconds, the hologram of the Illusive Man appeared in front of him. Shepard could see a red star, what he figured was some sort of sun, glowing brightly before him. He didn't know much about how stars worked, but he wondered why the ball was so red. _Wonder if__ that is a dying star?_ The Illusive Man was sat in his chair, smoking a cigarette. _Disgusting habit._ He also had a drink in hand. _I wonder what he drinks._ As before, he was quick to the point.

"Commander. Good work on Freedom's Progress. The quarians forwarded their findings from Veetor's debriefing. No new data, but it's a surprising olive branch, given our history." _I bet Tali had something to do with that. I owe her one. Though I knew she'd keep her word._ "You and I have different methods, but I can't argue with your results."

"Tali is a friend. Having plenty of those helps in the long run. If you played nice instead of running riot around the galaxy, you may find people would be more cooperative. People like me, who would prove invaluable allies to an organisation such as yours. Instead, you run roughshod over everyone, believing you have some form of divine right. And then you piss people like me off."

"Diplomacy is great when it works, but difficult when everyone already perceives you as a threat."

"It's because you are a threat. Don't forget, I know all about your past. Like apparently you know mine. I know exactly what you and your organisation are capable of. Seen it with my own eyes, remember?"

"Whatever the case, Shepard, and more importantly, you confirmed the Collectors are behind the abductions."

He thought for a moment. _He doesn't sound surprised. At all. The bastard knew all along. Fuck! Fell for his bullshit, hook, line and sinker. But… I can't back out now. The bastard is right. This needs to be handled. And needs to be handled quickly. __Jacob was right about one thing. The Alliance can't or won't do anything it seems. How could an entire colony be taken without what appears to be next to no resistance?_ He sighed._ Despite how distasteful all this is, Cerberus appear to be the only people willing to step up and actually solve this crisis now. P__erhaps it's time to look at the bigger picture, Shepard? You know the Reapers are a threat. They will need to be handled in time. If the Collectors are a threat now, then they need to be handled as well._

_But working with Cerberus? Come on, Shepard. Remember everything they did. They murdered Kahoku. And what about what they did to Toombs? Are you going to forget about him? And what about all those colonists you saved on Nodacrux? Are you just going to forget about all of them?_

_Here's what you do: find out what he knows. Find out what he has to offer. Two words for now, Shepard: Bigger Picture._

_Then you can look in a mirror and hate yourself for it later._

First, though, it was time to find out what he knew. "Why do I have the feeling you knew all about this? You don't sound surprised by any of this. At all."

"I had my suspicions, but I needed the proof. The Collectors are enigmatic at best. They periodically travel to the Terminus Systems, looking to gather seemingly unimportant items or specimens. Usually in exchange for their technology. When their transactions are complete, they disappear as quickly as they arrived; back beyond the unmapped Omega Four relay. Until now, we've had no evidence of direct aggression by the Collectors."

"What's the Omega Four relay? Why is it unmapped? Never heard of it myself."

"No ship that's ever passed through the relay has returned to let us know what is on the other side. We assume it leads to the Collector home-world."

"Any idea why a vessel has never returned?"

"Our best guess is that the relay reacts differently to Collector vessels, allowing them safe passage. If they can manipulate relays, that's just further evidence of their connection with the Reapers."

"Okay, why the sudden interest in humanity? We've barely been on the scene for thirty years. The turians are probably the biggest military threat, the salarians regarding science, and the asari regarding Machiavellian politics. Surely those three are the bigger threats?"

"It could for any number of reasons. The most obvious, however, is that humanity played the largest role in Sovereign's destruction. I'm sure that drew their attention." Shepard could only nod his head in agreement. "What really concerns me is why bother abducting the colonists. Once the humans are paralysed, why not just kill them?"

"I'm glad they're not. I'd just like to find them alive, if possible."

"On that we can agree, Commander. Despite what you may believe, I want to help and protect the colonists. They are humans, just like you and me."

He took a deep breath, rubbing his forehead with his right hand, closing his eyes as he thought. _He has all the answers. He already has it all figured out. Why the hell am I here helping him? I'm nothing but a pawn on a chessboard for him. This a bad idea… but this is a job that needs to be done. __Yeah, good luck explaining this to the Alliance or the Council when they find out I'm alive._

"Listen, it appears you already have it all figured out. What aren't you telling me?"

"The patterns are there, buried in the data. The Council and the Alliance want to believe the Reaper threat died with Sovereign. You and I know better."

"Councillor Anderson believes in the Reaper threat. He also believed... believes in me. Why not get in touch with him? Convince him of these threats. The Collectors are real. They're out there right now. Taking our people. The Reapers are behind them. Once we've got the evidence, why not approach the Council? Surely we can convince them? They seemed convinced enough about the threat before I died."

"Anderson is but one of four voices on the Council, Commander. And not a very popular voice regarding anything to do with the Reapers. As for the rest of the Council, they have buried their heads in the sand regarding the Reaper threat. Whatever their reasons, I won't wait until the Reapers are on the march, Shepard. We're at war, whether they want to believe it or not. We need to take the fight to them."

_Bloody hell, I can't help but agree with the bastard on that point._ "Very well, if we are at war, I'm going to need a team. And I'm going to need the best."

"I've already compiled a list of soldiers, scientists and mercenaries. You'll get dossiers on the best of them. Finding them and convincing them to work with you could be challenging, but you're a natural leader. I'll continue to track the Collectors. When they make their next appearance, I'll notify you and your team. Be ready."

"You think I'm going to trust the names you provide me? I had a team. A team I trusted with life. The team I worked with while hunting Saren."

"Two years is a long time, Commander. They've moved on. But, if you want details, Miranda can fill you in. I'll forward the information I have on them to her and yourself. But, I won't say trust me, Shepard, as I know you won't, but you'll want these names. They're the best around. And you'll want them on your team."

"Fair enough. I can accept that point. I'll take a look at the dossiers. What about my Spectre status?"

"You were classified as killed in action, Commander, so you no longer retain that status. However, if you wish to approach the Council to help, then by all means, go ahead."

He raised in eyebrows in surprise at that. _Thought he would have tried warning me off that one. _"Very well, forward me anything you have and I'll take a look and get to work." _Ugh, I feel like I might throw up and I'm definitely going to need a long, hot shower after this._

"Commander. Two things before you go." _Fuck me, what now?_ "First, head to Omega and find Mordin Solus. He's a brilliant salarian scientist. Our intelligence suggests he may know how to counteract the Collectors' paralysing seeker swarms."

"Giving orders already? In case you've forgotten, I don't work for you." _Keep this up, Shepard, and you will be shot in the back of the head. Then buried in some unmarked grave. You know what these people are capable of._

He noticed the Illusive Man just grinned, waving a dismissive hand. "I'm merely giving you direction, Commander. A helpful suggestion. Nothing more. I'm just hoping you make the right choice."

He sighed. "Very well. Point taken. What's the second thing?"

"I've found a pilot I think you may like. I hear he's one of the best. And he's someone you can trust."

* * *

><p>He was nervous. It had been over two years since the <em>Normandy<em> had been destroyed and Shepard had been lost. Since then, his life had, quite frankly, gone down the toilet. He'd been grounded indefinitely due to what the Alliance called post-traumatic stress disorder. Unable to fly, he had found little point to his current existence. Stuck on Arcturus, he grew out his beard and found solace in the bottle. He didn't have many friends at the best of times, but even those he had soon steered clear of him.

He was on the Citadel on leave when he was approached by a woman calling herself Miranda Lawson. She was aware of his grounding by the Alliance so had a job offer that would allow him to fly. In addition to allowing him to fly, the organisation she was working for would also offer medical assistance regarding his Vrolik Syndrome. It wasn't a cure, but the organisation she worked for carried out numerous experiments on all sorts of diseases and ailments, and they had made progress in the treatment of his. The simple fact was that, if he agreed, he would be able to walk, carefully, unaided. There was a proviso to all this, though.

The company he would be working for was Cerberus.

He was almost ready to walk – well, hobble – out of the bar he was sat in when Miranda dropped her largest bombshell.

Cerberus were working on returning Commander Shepard to life. To say he was flabbergasted was an understatement. He'd carried that guilt around with him every day since the _Normandy_ had been destroyed. To hear that the Commander may be alive almost defied belief.

In the end, he didn't need much time to think. His life was about flying. The Alliance had taken that away. Cerberus were offering his life back.

He took the offer.

He felt awkward sitting in his Cerberus uniform, waiting for the Commander's meeting with the Illusive Man to finish. He'd never met the boss man himself, never even heard his voice. But Miranda had informed him that the Illusive Man had specifically requested his assistance for the current mission. _I wonder what the Commander thinks about all this. Would he be willing to work with Cerberus after everything? I mean, at least I have a reason. They're letting me fly again._

"The Commander's meeting with the Illusive Man has completed. You may go through now, if you wish," Miranda stated, turning her slightly towards him for the merest of moments before returning her attention to the screen.

He stood up and walked – actually walked, completely unaided – up the hallway to meet Shepard. _Cerberus may be considered evil, but they're a good sort of evil. Still can't believe how much easier my life is after those operations._ He turned the corner and came to a stop. There stood the Commander. _I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't see it with my own eyes._

Shepard turned around as he started walking down the small set of stairs towards him and came to a stop. He wasn't sure if he should salute or not. He was no longer part of the Alliance, the Commander was considered a dead man. "Hey, Commander, just like old times, huh?"

He watched a large grin form across the Commander's face. "Joker! What the hell are you doing here?" he asked, walking forward and grasping his hand. "I can't believe it's you!"

Joker couldn't help but grin back at his Commander. "You're one to talk, Commander. I saw you get spaced."

Shepard released his hand and rubbed his chin in thought. "Yeah, I suppose you could call it lucky, but then again, I'm stuck with this lot for the time being. What are you doing here though?"

"Come on, we'll walk and talk. Apparently they have something to show us." Joker gestured back up the stairs, his Commander falling in alongside as they made their way through the station, Joker following the signs towards the docking bays. "It all fell apart without you, Commander. Everything you stirred up, the Council just wanted it gone."

"Even Anderson?"

"Not entirely sure, Commander. I know he believes you about the Reapers, but he's only one man."

"So I keep being told."

"Anyway, after your funeral…"

"You held a funeral?"

"Of course. You were considered dead, Commander. It was actually quite nice. The food afterwards was divine. But Anderson spoke highly of you. Then again, I don't think anyone had a bad word to say about you. Anyway, after all that, the team was split up. All records from the mission were sealed, by both the Council and the Alliance. And I was grounded."

"What? Why? You're the best damned pilot in the Alliance."

"I was. Post-traumatic stress disorder, they called it. Apparently seeing your Commander Officer spaced, and feeling guilty about it, was detrimental to my ability to pilot a ship."

Joker felt Shepard grab him by the shoulder, urging him to stop. "Losing the Normandy wasn't your fault, Joker. And as for me…," Shepard was silent as he apparently thought of what to say, "Well, I'm here now. Alive. Circumstances could be better. But at least I'll have the best pilot in the Alliance flying my ship," he finished with a light pat in the shoulder.

"Thanks for saying that, Commander. But it was my fault. I can accept that, so don't worry about it. If I had left as soon as you'd ordered, you probably wouldn't have died and I wouldn't be working with Cerberus. But, in the end, the Alliance took away the only thing that mattered to me. So when Cerberus approached me with the offer to fly again, I accepted."

The pair came to a window that look out over the docks. Joker could see nothing but darkness but he was aware of what was out there. It would be a nice surprise for the Commander.

"Do you trust them, Joker? Cerberus? The Illusive Man?"

"I certainly don't trust Cerberus. This is simply a means to an end. A job. Honestly, I don't really trust anyone. Except you, Commander. And considering they saved your life, and let me fly, I guess they can't be all bad."

"Maybe…."

Joker then gestured out the window. "Then there is this. They only told me about it last night."

Both men walked forward as the dark silhouette outside was slowly illuminated by a series of lights. An enormous ship. Sleek in design. Painted on the front splitters and on the hull were the words SR-2. Even sitting still in the docking bay, it looked fast. Painted white, black and gold. They were the colours of Cerberus, but at that moment, Joker didn't mind. All he knew is that he would fly again. And he could fly this beautiful machine. Out of the corner of his eye he watched the Commander take a step forward, putting his left hand on the glass as he looked on in wonder.

"Wow," he heard the Commander say quietly.

"It's good to be home, huh, Commander?"

Shepard put his other hand on his shoulder. "It sure is, Joker."

The two men continued to look over her in silence for a few minutes more. Joker wasn't sure, but he assumed the Commander had a slight lump in his throat looking over his new ship. Joker could feel his own lump as he gazed, taking in all the lines and contours of the design. He couldn't wait to get behind the wheel, so to speak, and take this for a spin. At least this time he wouldn't have to steal it to prove how good he is.

"I guess we'll have to give her a name," the Commander stated. Joker looked across at Shepard, who just looked back at him. Their understanding was unspoken. There was only one name she could be called. A name that meant the most to them.

"Are you sure, Commander?"

Shepard grinned. "I'm sure, Joker. She's been reborn. Bigger. Stronger. Faster. I can't think of a better name." He paused a beat as he looked back at the ship. "We're going home, Joker," he added quietly.

Joker called across one of the technicians standing nearby waiting for the instruction. "We'd like a name painted on the side of the ship."

"What name would that be?"

Joker looked back at Shepard, who grinned and nodded, before the Commander looked back outside at his ship. Joker turned his attention back to the technician.

"Normandy."

* * *

><p><em>AN - Despite my Shepard's hatred for Cerberus, he's getting his own ship once again. And it was only ever going to be the Normandy._


End file.
